Page 77 of AJ’s Fire

“I always have the mac and cheese, Uncle Jax.” We may not have told anyone about us, but we spent enough time with Vera that she may have picked up on the change in our relationship. She had started calling Jackson Uncle Jax of her own accord. He pulled the menu between the two of them and started coloring. Vera joined in and started telling Jackson about the upcoming Easter holiday.

“We’re driving to Grandma and Grandpa Gordon’s house. Uncle Vance is there, and Uncle Joshy, and Uncle Hunter, but Uncle AJ’s not coming this year. Uncle Jackson, since you come to my dance practices, you're going to come to my recital, right?”

“Of course, princess,” I heard Jackson enthuse.

“Is Nat terribly disappointed?” I asked Jamie.

“Actually, I would say she’s thrilled, based on her tone when she told me, but she wouldn’t tell me why. Is this what you wanted to talk to me about?”

I slid my chair back, eyeing Vera, and Jamie did the same so that we were a foot or two away from the table. We scooched our chairs closer together, and I gave an up nod in Jackson’s direction. He and Vera were having a sword fight with their crayons, and occasionally Vera would “win” and get to color on the paper.

“I’m going to Scarsdale with him.”

“Holy shit, finally going to meet the Dorsos? Wow, like, actual famous people! Oh my God, you’re not going to end up just like Dad and Nat, are you? They still name drop President Fisher because they met him one time when he taught at HU.”

“It’s not like that, Jamie. I’m not going because I want to meet the famous people. Besides, I’ve already met them.” I looked at Vera and Jackson again. He may have been trying to listen in, but he was focused on keeping my niece distracted. I looked at my brother. “I’m going to spend the holiday with my boyfriend.”

You would think with what Jamie was going through at the time, he would have been able to process what I was saying. It took him longer than I would have thought. He stared at me. He took a sip of beer. He watched Jackson and Vera hovering over the menu. He looked at me again.

“You and Jackson?”

I nodded slowly. “Me and Jackson.”

“Since when?”

“Since the day I met him if I’m being honest.” Jackson looked up at me and smiled. A look I was happy to return as I continued. “But technically since New Year’s Eve, or last New Year’s Eve.” I shook my head. “It’s complicated.”

“You should have told me!”

“Jamie, you’ve been dealing with your own shit.”

“I’ve been dealing with my own shit for many years; that doesn’t mean I don’t want to help my brother!” The agitation in Jamie’s voice drew Vera’s attention, and she scowled in a way that reminded me of her mother. Jamie would be dealing with reminders of Anna for the rest of his life. He deserved to have a little fun with a younger guy, and he deserved to not have to worry about his brother while he did it.

“I will tell you the whole story. I promise. I’ll even lie on the couch while you push your glasses up your nose and ask me pointed questions.”

“You know it only works that way in cartoons, right?”

I glowered. “But for now, the short version. Me, him. Dating.” Jackson looked up again and winked at me before nodding and smiling at my brother.

“His parents know, but they’re … adjusting. That’s why Easter is important. It will be our first time being out. Being together. Nat knows because seriously, can anyone in this family keep a fucking secret from Nat? She asked one question, and I caved like I was caught in Wonder Woman’s lasso.”

“Vance,” Jamie muttered.

“Huh?”

I think Vance has a secret, and I think it drives Nat crazy.”

“Yeah, that’s probably right. He’s a pretty private guy. You okay with all this?” I asked.

“I mean, of course. I just wish you’d said something. We could have been going through this together.”

“Yeah, well, we can go through it now. You deserved your time.” I shouldered him. “Your experiment.”

Jamie lowered his voice. “You and Jax? Is it an experiment?” He’d heard his name despite Jamie’s whisper, so Jackson looked up again.

“Nah. I love him. Always have. I was just too stupid to understand what that meant.”

“Holy fuck.”