Page 28 of Josh’s Play

“No, you should come with me. Please?”

Chapter Ten

Campbell

I knew if we split up that there was a chance I would chicken out and not follow Josh back to his dorm. I was energized by our win but still weighed down with thoughts about the man standing next to me. It was a potent combination.

I pulsed with energy after every game, win or lose, and after every game that year, my thoughts had turned to Josh. I’d look at Noah and Diane, or any of the other players with girlfriends, and feel such a loss, like actual grief. I tried to think of it as general jealousy over what they had, but always, every time, it was Josh I would imagine by my side, his smile, his laugh, the way we talked about everything in study room 3C, even when we were only supposed to be talking about hockey. I wasn’t jealous of the esoteric concept of a partner; I was jealous that Josh wasn’t with me the way that Diane was with Noah.

I’d had a couple of great saves in a row in the first period, my last coming right before the buzzer. I was riding high, and before I could overthink it, I had texted Josh. I didn’t know what I wanted, I just knew I wanted to see him, to be with him. I continued to play well throughout the game, helping to secure a three to oh win for the HU Badgers.

We made it back to my house, and it was surprisingly quiet. A few people were in the living room drinking and talking, but not as many as I had thought would be there.

I blurted out, “Where is everyone?”

“Someone texted that they weren’t carding at Lefty’s, so a bunch of people took off in that direction,” Noah shared. “We won’t be insulted if you two join them.” He wrapped an arm around Diane. “All the girls here are taken.”

I looked at Josh. “Oh, um. I’m just gonna go take this suit off, and then we can decide.”

“I’ll wait for you here.” Josh looked at me pointedly as Noah welcomed him into the group.

“Hey, guy from the party.”

“Hey, guy from the hockey team,” Josh countered. “I guess I’m the guy from Campbell’s sports journalism class now. I insisted I needed to know everything about the game, including post-game party rituals, if we’re gonna ace our project.”

Someone handed Josh a drink and encouraged him to ask them anything. I looked at him in question, and he gave me a subtle nod, which morphed into an evil grin as he turned back to the group and replied, “Anything, you say?”

I ran upstairs to change. Part of me was so wound up that I almost texted Josh to make some excuse to join me, but then I remembered that he had an empty dorm room available, a much safer place for us to be alone, whether it was just to talk, or if I was brave enough to ask for something more. I changed quickly and returned downstairs to find the group laughing and drinking beer. I slipped into the kitchen to get one of my own and joined the small circle of teammates and friends in the living room.

Josh had pulled out his little notebook and was jotting things down as the guys fed him stories about practice and games and after parties.

“You know most of us stay here over Thanksgiving. Training isn’t mandatory, but Coach makes it clear that everyone should attend.”

“Yeah, the phrase voluntary practice basically means be there or else,” I contributed as I walked out of the kitchen.

“You guys don’t go home for Thanksgiving?”

“Well, people who live close enough, like Cam, can head home for the day, at least, but I’m from Texas, so it’s easier just to stick around. Last year my parents came here, but I’m on my own this year. A bunch of us are, and we’re having Thanksgiving dinner here,” Ethan shared.

“Where are you from? Is it a pain for you to get home?” Noah asked Josh. I couldn’t help but snort, and Josh and Diane laughed outright.

He pointed toward the side of the house. “My family lives about two blocks that way, so traveling for the holidays is not an issue for me.”

“Oh, wow. Cool.” Noah continued, “You’ll have to come to the stragglers’ party at Delta Tau that Friday, then. Anyone who’s around is welcome! We may have to attend practices on Friday and Saturday, but that doesn’t mean we can’t have a little fun in between! A bunch of the foreign students usually show up. It’s a good time.”

Josh shot me a look and responded noncommittally with a, “Thanks, man.”

The only spot left to sit was on the couch next to Josh, and I didn’t trust myself to be that close to him, so I sat on the floor instead, leaning off the side of one of our living room chairs. From above me, Ethan mussed up my hair and joked, ‘What, does the new guy have cooties?”

I made a point of stretching out my legs and flexing my ankles, hoping to throw Ethan off the scent. I hated having to hide, and I could barely look at Josh without blushing. I could feel his eyes on me even though I didn’t look up. He rescued me, nonetheless.

“Ankle bugging you?” I snapped my head up then and fought to keep from smiling.

“All good,” I said as I shook my head no. “Just the general aches and pains of the game. Stretching helps.” Josh picked up his notebook and wrote something down, or maybe he pretended to because his eyes never really left mine, and I could see the laughter in them. It occurred to me that Ethan might be able to see the ice-blue dance over my shoulder. How did our connection look to my housemate and team captain?

“Found the title for your podcast, then?” Ethan joked. “‘Stretching Helps.’”

Josh raised his eyebrows. “More like a life motto.” He got a good laugh out of that one, but I couldn’t join in, my chest tightening, thinking of Josh getting along with my friends. Thinking about hanging out like this all the time, with Josh there as my person. Thinking about Josh stretching. I sipped my beer, then carded my fingers through my hair while Josh asked which title the group liked better, Hockey One Oh One or Season in the Spotlight.