Page 67 of Josh’s Play

“I do,” he promised before he leaned down, and our cold lips met.

I understood what his dad meant about floating on the ice. He wrapped an arm around my waist and led me around the pond at a much more rapid pace than I’d ever gone on my own. We took one more lap before Cam led us to the pond’s edge.

I exited the ice feeling like I was the one floating. But watching him as we pulled apart and neared land, I could see it, an otherworldly lightness, a weight lifted. He wasn’t skating, he was flying.

We sat next to each other and removed our skates, sneaking peeks at each other and smiling. I thought about all the times I’d been at the park as a kid. I’d never felt more excited or giddier than I did in that moment.

Cam finished before me, and I could sense him watching me. I shoved my foot in my boot and turned until I was straddling the bench, sliding close to him as he turned his head to watch. I pulled him down toward me by the neck and kissed him there on the cold bench. I could have stayed like that all night, but Cam noticed the shiver that ran through me as a blast of wind washed over us. He pulled us apart, but I kept my hand on his face, keeping him close.

“Didn’t you grow up here? You’d think you could handle a little bit of cold.” I pulled him close again so that we were practically lip to lip.

“You could go back to warming me up, please.” He pecked my lips but pulled away again.

“Nah, we better get out of here. The guys who run the place said they’d tell the park ranger we were here, but you never know.” Campbell stood, and I missed the feel of him near me. “I’ve got to shut off the lights and this ridiculous tween music. He turned on the flashlight on his phone, and I did the same.

“Need help?”

“It’ll just take a second.” I used the time to scroll on social media to find a picture of my best friend and my niece hanging some sort of wooden contraption in the backyard. The caption informed me that the contraption was in fact a bird feeder, and that Devon, of all people, had assisted my niece in making it at an Explorer Girls meeting. Cam could see my odd smile, and as the music was off, hear my odd laugh as he returned.

“What?”

“Check out the future wolf of Wall Street. He apparently attended an Explorer Girls meeting tonight.”

“My youngest brother was an Explorer Boy for a few years.” Cam looked at the picture, then at me. “I can’t come out, Josh. We can’t post silly pictures of us breaking into the state park.”

Oh, Cam wasn’t joining me in mocking my roommate for being so domestic. He’d turned serious again. I tucked my phone away.

“I understand.” I stroked his face again, so happy that I could that I thought I would do it every time I saw him. His comment reminded me that I wouldn’t be able to. “No one needs to know.”

“I know that’s unfair. I mean, Noah and Diane basically know. And my parents. But …”

“It’s okay, Cam. You need us to be secret. My lips are sealed. I promise.”

Chapter Eighteen

Campbell

It was a challenge for Josh and me to find time together, but there was one afternoon that neither of us had class and my housemates did. We made use of that particular hour and a half every week. Occasionally, we’d run into one of my roommates, who shrugged it off as me hanging out with my “friend from the party” as everyone still called him.

Josh, true to his word, didn’t tell anyone about us, and we pointedly did not hang out with his circle of friends. Josh said he didn’t think he could hide how he felt in front of them. He hadn’t told his family since so many of them were entwined with the college, and though he and Devon had talked briefly after Josh’s performance at the stragglers’ party, he hadn’t come right out and told his best friend either.

I came home one weekday evening to my roommates all heading out. “We’re doing dinner and a movie. You in?”

“Nah,” I said nonchalantly. “I think I’ll hang out here. Got some reading to catch up on.” Noah shot me a look, which I ignored as I pulled out my phone to text Josh.

Finn: Got the place to myself for a few.

Shelley: Fuck, dinner with my parents and Devon. Aa scout came to see Hunter!!!!!!

Shelley: How is it possible I have two future professional sportsball people in my life?

Josh knew me well enough at that point to immediately text me an image of a hand, knocking on a piece of wood.

Shelley: I can’t believe I’m missing out on an empty house.

Finn: It’s ok. That’s amazing about Hunter. Have fun with your family.

I sat in my empty house, thinking about Josh being home with his parents and hating that they didn’t know about us. I could tell keeping us quiet was eating at him, but he tried to mask it when we were together. Later that night, I’d worried myself so much that I texted him again.