Page 61 of With All My Haunted Heart

Halloween is next Friday. The B&B is already haunted, and once Midnight Manor officially opens, my job will be done. Even without the complication of her niece, this was always a time-limited fling. Next week, I’ll go home to my empty apartment and my crumbling business. A business that money might not save. A business that’s as defective as I am.

I should text Dea and ask her to run the numbers, see how adding retail or teaching options could affect our bottom line…

When the video of Willa dancing with her siblings finishes, Elle tucks her phone back into her pocket. “I should go find the kids. Ted will want to be with Viv for the MRI results.”

I nod, my back screaming at me as I get up off the too-soft couch. “I’ll leave you to it.”

“Actually…” Elle stands and reaches for my wrist, tugging me back to her. Her hands come to rest at my hips, and she pulls me close. “Do you think you could stay? I’ve missed you so much this week, and I trust my sister not to say anything to Alex.”

My traitorous heart flutters, ignoring all the reminders I gave myself. “I’ll go wherever you want me,” I say, tipping my forehead down to hers.

Elle rises onto her toes to kiss me, the brush of her lips brief but bruising. “Thank you.” Her whispered words are full of emotion, but then she chuckles. “You know, I keep thinking there’s some alternate universe out there. One where Willa never got sick and Barrett loved Alex the way he deserved.”

“Yeah?”

She nods and bites down on her lower lip. “In that universe, we meet for the first time at Alex’s wedding. Everyone is happy, so we get to make out on the dance floor without needing to worry about anyone getting hurt.”

“That sounds nice.” I force a smile, even though all my heart hears is that in this universe, we aren’t meant to be. That I can only be the woman she keeps in the shadows.

I know it’s unfair. I saw for myself how hurt Xander is. Elle is right to keep this from him. But my heart doesn’t give a shit about logic, and as I follow Elle to the children’s play area, all I can hear is the clock counting down the moments until this is all over.

Chapter

Eighteen

I spend the rest of the day with Elle and her family.

Vivian nearly squeezed the life out of me when Elle explained that I’d agreed to help. I don’t think she heard me when I reiterated that I couldn’t make any promises, but then the doctors were there with the MRI results. I volunteered to entertain the kids while the adults discussed Willa’s prognosis, making heavy use of the celebration sigil that creates tiny fireworks above my palm.

Even Willa seemed to enjoy the showy magic, a flicker of delight in her eyes as she watched from her wheelchair.

When Elle, Vivian, and Ted came back, their false cheer couldn’t hide the pain in their eyes. I tried to duck out, to give the family privacy, but Vivian insisted that I come home with them for dinner. And when Elle reached for my hand and rested her head against my shoulder to reiterate her sister’s invitation, I couldn’t say no.

But now it’s late, and since Elle and I drove separately to the hospital—and then to her sister’s house—we have to drive home alone, too. Not home, I remind myself. At least, not mine.

Elle’s taillights guide the way to Midnight Manor, and it’s a good thing, because I’m too distracted to navigate back to the B&B on my own. My mind flips through the day’s events. Overlays everything I’ve learned against all the other interactions I’ve had with Elle. Weighs our relationship against the others I’ve already lost.

Eriksons don’t let things slip, Perpetua.

Belonging to this family is a privilege. Not a right.

Despite what the most skittish, vulnerable parts of me insist, Elle isn’t anything like my mother. I know that. I’ve seen how much she cares about her family. She has a capacity for love that Nanette Erikson simply doesn’t possess. If this thing between Elle and me is nothing more than a welcome distraction, doesn’t she deserve that?

Those thoughts weigh heavy on my chest as I follow Elle up the driveway to the manor. We park in our usual spots, and I push my own anxieties away. Even if the emotions that are real to me are simply a temporary comfort for Elle, I can do that for her.

When I exit the car, my back is stiff and the mood between us is serious. Gone is the casual touch we enjoyed at the hospital and at Vivian’s place. Her hand on my knee. Fingers intertwined. An arm draped around my waist. Instead, she keeps strict distance between us while the waxing crescent of the moon oversees our approach to the B&B.

“The lights are on.” Elle stares up at the front door, confusion creasing her brow. “I thought Alex would be in bed by now.”

A pulsing sound filters through the wooden door. “Is that music?”

Elle hurries up the steps and slides her key into the lock, letting us inside. The heavy bass thuds against my chest, beating alongside my heart. It’s honestly impressive how much the doors and walls deadened the sound from the outside.

And then there’s Xander, skin sweat-slicked, eyes hazy, as he dances alone with a near-empty bottle of wine dangling from his fingertips. The dozen pairs of ghost goggles lay scattered on the side table, a final pair resting on Xander’s face.

He grins wide when he sees us. “My favorite girls are home!” Xan pulls us into a group hug, one arm wrapped around each of us, and presses a kiss to the tops of our heads. He smells like he usually does—sun-kissed skin and sea air—with the added musk of sweat on his skin and wine on his breath. Is all this because a cute guy at the antiques store flirted with him?

“Alex?” Elle’s voice is wary as she shrugs out from under his touch. “What are you doing?”