Page 100 of What We Got Wrong

“Oh, please. Feel free to share.” Liv was sick of talking around the issue, honestly, and she wanted them to just get it over with.

It was like Emma took Liv’s words as a challenge. “To start, I would like you to eat, because I don’t think you’ve been taking very good care of yourself. Then, I want one of you two idiots to end this standoff. I want someone to blink and reach out, so that I don’t have to spend my last semester of college being your go-between. I would love to go back into our bestie triad bubble and enjoy this time, before I move home and being a real fucking adult starts.”

Though it was new to Liv, the way that she said it gave the strong impression that it may not have been the first time she’d relayed that particular message.

“Emma, it sounds like it would be a lot easier on you if you just stop pretending to be my friend,” Liv said simply, and she set her plate of food down next to Emma’s.

Her friend reacted like she’d slapped her. “What the hell are you talking about? I have never been pretending to be your friend.”

“But our friendship has always been tied up with Quinn,” Liv said.

“I mean, sure,” Emma admitted. “She introduced us, and it’s been the three of us more than not. But I’m not Quinn.”

“But every time I look at you, I think about her,” Liv whispered, even though she knew it was probably something she shouldn’t say.

“Well, it sounds like you were the one pretending to be my friend, then, Liv,” Emma replied, positively gutted. “If you want me to go away because you two broke up—"

“We didn’t break up,” Liv interrupted.

Emma threw up her hands and groaned. “I thought we’d be done with this stupid conversation once you two stopped sleeping together, but it feels like it is going to haunt me until my very grave.”

“You have to be in a relationship to break up,” Liv insisted stubbornly.

“Oh my God,” Emma shouted. “You two are so in love with each other, and you’re going to burn down your whole fucking life just so you don’t have to say it. It’s ridiculous.”

“Tell me how you really feel,” Liv replied. She could do this. This fight, this edge that they were about to tip over, it felt better, somehow, than the weeks of torment and silence.

And, sure, she knew objectively that she shouldn’t be taking all of this out on Emma. She shouldn’t be treating her like this, like a punching bag at her disposal.

But she was right here, and Emma was screaming at her, too.

“I have not been shy about how I felt about this from the very beginning,” Emma said. “You both have the emotional maturity of snails, at least when it comes to yourselves and your own feelings, and I knew it was going to end badly.”

“It must be great to know everything, Em,” Liv replied.

“This angry act you’re putting on right now isn’t cute,” Emma responded.

Act? Act? She thought that Liv's being angry was an act? That couldn’t be further from the truth. Her sadness had fused with anger, the two emotions joining to create a gnawing, festering sensation that she couldn’t shake.

Every mistake Liv had made, every person Liv had hurt, she was sure those things had been entirely under her control. She was the one to propose that she and Quinn “not date” each other, even though she knew, she knew, that it was a bad idea. That they’d been too close for it to ever be simple. And she was the one who’d ignored every warning from Emma, every sign that Quinn was hurting, all because she wanted to hold on tightly for just a little longer.

She was furious with herself.

She couldn’t… No, that wasn’t it. She didn’t want to explain that to Emma, though, so she just said, trying to keep her voice steady, “Can you please just go away?”

Emma nodded even as the hurt washed over her face. “Of course. Certainly wouldn’t want to force you to pretend to be my friend. Feel free to reach out, though, when you’re ready to apologize.”

With Liv sufficiently put in her place, Emma marched out of the apartment, and Liv had the displeasure of understanding, yet again, that she’d just chased a great person out of her life.

Chapter 37

Liv

Now

The week after the conference was always a bit of a whirlwind: getting back into the swing of a normal workweek, getting caught up on the ‘real work’ that got pushed aside for the week dedicated to training and development. Liv had hundreds of emails to get through, and it was a good distraction.

She totally didn’t spend every day thinking of Quinn. She definitely didn’t spend every night reliving the feeling of Quinn’s lips on her skin, Quinn’s fingers inside her, Quinn’s arms—those arms—wrapped around her.