Page 20 of Alec’s Dream

“No!”

I took a deep breath and launched into what happened. I started with Alec at Little Lights hearing Doug’s threat and didn’t stop until I told him everything. Including me hitting Doug and what Alec had said about what I was teaching my kids.

It sucked watching my dad’s face getting tight then tighter until it was a deep shade of red and I was afraid he was going to have a heart attack.

“About time you punched that asshole in the face.”

“Dad,” I admonished.

“And I hate to say it, sweet pea, but this Alec guy has a point.” My eyes closed in an effort to block out my dad. “Macy, I understand what you’re teaching Rory and Caleb—to be kind at all costs. I know you’re trying to offset what Doug’s showing them. But it comes at a cost.”

“It shouldn’t. I shouldn’t have to roll around in the mud with Doug. That’s setting a bad example. Mom always says kill ‘em with kindness.”

“She does and you wanna know why she can say that, totally ridiculous saying?”

“It’s not ridiculous.”

“Sweet pea, it is. It’s bullshit. And your mom can say it, because she’s had me at her back all these years making it safe for her to spout out that kind of ridiculousness.”

To say my dad was protective of my mom was an understatement. He was protective of me, too, when I wasn’t behaving like an idiot, forcing him to allow me to make my own mistakes because I refused to listen to him.

“Macy.” My dad’s tone softened and I was worried he was going to lay some more truths on me and I wasn’t sure I could take any more. “You’re mistaking being kind for being a sucker. You’re mistaking rolling in the mud with Doug for standing up for yourself demanding respect. You think you’re taking the high road when really you’re still giving Doug the upper hand. He knows he can do and say whatever he wants to you because you’ll take it. And you do it because you love your kids and you want to protect them. But your friend is right, you’re doing them no favors if you’re not actually protecting them.”

I was right, I couldn’t take it. I felt tears hit my eyes.

“I don’t know what to do.”

“I think you do. I think today, finally, you’ve had enough. You’ve been beating your head against a wall. What’s the worst that can happen if you stop letting Doug walk all over you?”

“Rory and Caleb end up hating me.”

“Hate you? For what?”

“For being a bitch to their father. For taking him away from them. For…I don’t know…for hurting them.”

“Sweetheart, you are a good mother. You put them before yourself to the point of detriment.”

“I’m their mother. I’m supposed to.”

“No, Macy you are not. You need—”

“Momma,” Rory came into the kitchen. “I’m hungry.”

“Well, then we better get you home so I can feed my girl.”

“Can I help you cook dinner?”

“May I,” I corrected.

“May I help?”

“Of course you may. Go tell your brother we’re leaving. But first, say goodbye to your gramps.”

“Bye, Gramps.” Rory bounced to my dad and threw her little body against his, wrapping her arms around his waist. “Thank you for taking us to the movies. And for buying popcorn. And soda. And for buying me a pretty new shirt. I’m gonna wear it to school Monday.”

“You’re very welcome, my pretty princess.”

“Love you bunches,” Rory finished.