Page 58 of Alec’s Dream

I decided to use my time wisely. With Becky and Rob there, I knew my kids would be comfortable with me slipping away and taking a shower, though Rory seemed to be just fine with Alec being in the house, and Caleb was warming up to him.

I wasn’t entirely sure how I felt about that even though he’d made it clear he was barging into my life whether I liked it or not. Something I didn’t have the energy to think about. Especially not when he was in the house muddling with my head. Alec had a way about him that made me want to give in when I knew I should’ve been running.

But right then, staring at myself in the mirror, all thoughts of Alec fled.

It wasn’t until that moment when I finally let it sink in. The pain of Josh hitting me, the crushing fear of him hurting Rory. It was like I had an out-of-body experience where shock and surprise hadn’t allowed the attack to register. I could feel the blows, I knew they hurt, but all of my concern was on keeping Josh away from my daughter.

And looking at myself now, I knew I’d been lucky. Josh Malone was a big guy, if he’d meant to hurt me worse, he would’ve.

No, this was a message.

The bruises on my face were mild compared to the pain Josh would inflict if Doug didn’t pay him back. Handprints on my arms where he’d shook me with bone-jarring force. My chest had another red mark where he’d caught me by my shirt as I tried to get away.

Why?

Why was I paying for Doug’s shit—again?

Why couldn’t I get out from under the cloud of devastation that Doug left in his wake?

Why did my kids have to continue to suffer?

I fucking hated him. But really, I hated myself more. I’d stayed. I’d allowed it to happen. I should’ve left him before we were even married. I knew he was an asshole. I knew he’d never change. I knew he was lying every time he told me he loved me and promised he wouldn’t hurt me again.

So stupid.

“Honey?” Becky called from the bathroom door.

“What did I do to deserve this?”

I couldn’t look away from my watery image in the mirror even though I could barely see my own features through the tears.

“What did I ever do but love him?”

“Nothing, Macy, you didn’t do anything to deserve this.”

Then I was wrapped in my robe with my best friend’s arms locked around my body and I lost it. She took my weight as I collapsed and we went to the cold tile floor.

“Macy, girl, you’re scaring me.”

I’m sure I was but I couldn’t stop the hate from leaking out, tears poured down my cheeks and mixed with the water still dripping from my wet hair, soaking the front of her shirt. But I couldn’t pull myself together. Not this time. Not with the threats Josh made. I couldn’t do it alone.

“I got her.”

Strong arms lifted me off the floor. The fresh manly smell of Alec surrounded me but I had no fight left. What did it matter if he saw? I was nothing but a punching bag. A loser with a shitty life and shitty ex-husband who constantly put my family in danger.

18

Alec knew it was coming.

Macy had been in denial and it was only a matter of time before everything hit her. He figured it would happen when she tried to go to sleep but he should’ve known the reality of what had happened was going to strike when she finally had a moment alone.

After Jameson and Kennedy showed with the pizza and Jocelyn, he’d sent Becky in to check on her, not wanting to barge in on Macy if she was still in the shower. Then they’d heard the sound of something crash and he no longer cared about the state of her undress—he just needed to get to her.

Alec settled himself on Macy’s bed with her soft, pliant body cradled in his arms. It was with herculean effort he tamped down his own fury, reminding himself this was about Macy and her pain, not his anger or need for retribution. The sobbing woman in his arms was far more important than the vengeance he’d soon deliver.

With a look of concern, Becky left, closing the door behind her, and Alec was grateful the other woman trusted him enough to take care of Macy.

“Sweetheart, tell me what you’re thinking about,” he encouraged.