Page 36 of Redeeming Violet

“Did you know you had eyes on you?” I asked Declan.

“I clocked Ortega’s latest attempt the minute he arrived six months ago. He really needs to pay better, because the men he employs are amateurs. But if what you’re asking me is if I was followed from Peru, I wasn’t,” he told me.

I couldn’t think of anything else I could ask either Zane or Declan that would delay going down the stairs and blowing Violet’s world apart.

Fuck.

I didn’t like this one bit. Zane was right, it was easier to rip the band-aid off, but the twist in my gut I’d felt earlier had now moved north and my heart was pounding in my chest. I couldn’t place the emotion; it was somewhere between sympathy and regret. Something that felt a lot like caring and compassion.

Chapter Nineteen

Violet

“Are you sure you’re okay?” I asked Jasmin.

“I’m fine. I think the Thai food Linc and I had last night didn’t sit well.”

That was an understatement. She’d thrown up three times since she came over to babysit me, so Jaxon could run some errands. I never thought I’d say I was happy to have Jasmin’s company, but I was. I needed a minute away from Jaxon. There were too many emotions muddled up in my head. Too many emotions I wasn’t supposed to be feeling. I was nothing more than a government babysitting contract for him – then why did it feel like more?

He hadn’t tried to touch me in two days. Maybe the stupid comments I’d made before the President came over made him realize it was a bad idea to have sex again. Me and my stupid heart. Physically it was a great idea to continue to have sex. We were locked together in the basement all alone, with boxes full of condoms. I couldn’t think of a more satisfying way to pass the time. Instead, we’d done something far more dangerous and talked. I told him about growing up and he told me stories about all the trouble him and Cooper got into. He told me about being in the Air Force and the training he’d gone through to be a PJ. He even admitted he was scared on his first real mission when he’d almost lost a Combat Controller his team had gone in to rescue.

It was easier to lie to myself and pretend he meant nothing to me when I didn’t know how brave and generous he was. Now that I knew Jaxon Cain the person, not the Air Force PJ that worked as a security contractor, it was even harder not to allow my heart to engage. I knew better than to sleep with him, yet I couldn’t bring myself to regret it. Even if I wasn’t heading to prison, I was still going back to my sad, lonely existence.

“I have another bottle of water for you,” I continued to yell through the door.

I heard something at the door and instinctively looked over at the security screens on the wall. All three of them were black, and I hadn’t heard the alarm beep. I was beginning to think I was losing my mind being locked in the basement. Not only was I conjuring up dream worlds where Jaxon and I could fall in love and live happily ever after, I was hearing things as well. The second time I heard the noise, I knew I wasn’t crazy. I didn’t want to yell to a puking Jasmin and alert whoever was on the other side of the door that I knew they were there. I scanned the room, trying to find anything I could use as a weapon. The desks came up empty and the table we’d been using to eat had nothing but take-out wrappers on it, but then I remembered Jaxon told me there was a gun in the emergency closet and never to touch it because it was loaded.

I ran to the bedroom, into the closet, and quickly found the gun. The heavy metal frame felt cold in my hand. I remembered to click the safety off and ran back into the main room. I lifted the gun up in front of me and prayed I could hold it steady enough to pull the trigger. Jasmin was still in the bathroom, sick and completely vulnerable. The door swung open and I held by breath.

“What the fuck?”

I blinked a few times to make sure I wasn’t seeing things and I swayed on my feet.

“Lower the gun.”

I blinked again, this time through the tears that were clouding my vision.

“Vi, baby, put the gun down.” I tried to slow my breathing and focus on the men in front of me, but it wasn’t working. “Everything is okay.” Jaxon pulled the gun from my trembling hands, then I was in his arms and sobbing into his chest. A smell that was uniquely Jaxon enveloped me, a smell I would always associate with safety. “Breathe, Vi.” I hadn’t realized I was holding my breath in an effort to stop the crying.

How was Declan here? Why would they bring him here?

“You promised,” I cried. “You promised you wouldn’t tell him.”

“Baby, he came to us,” Jaxon said, kissing the top of my head.

I heard Zane saying something and Jasmin answering. His tone was angry and for the first time since I’d met Jasmin, she sounded unsure.

“Don’t grouch at her. She didn’t do anything wrong. Can’t a woman use the bathroom? It’s not her fault I got the gun.” Jasmin looked at me in surprise and started to say something, but I beat her to it. “Haven’t you ever had to pee? I didn’t want to yell at her through the door and warn the person breaking in that I knew they were there.”

“I can’t break in to my own goddamned building,” Zane barked.

“I didn’t know it was you.” I could feel Jaxon’s body shaking under my cheek. I lifted my head and looked up to confirm he was laughing. “What’s so funny.”

Instead of answering, Jaxon shook his head, smiled, then kissed my forehead. “You okay?”

“No,” I answered honestly. I wasn’t fine. The one person I didn’t want to know what I’d done was standing ten feet away from me. The brother I’d forgotten. I wasn’t ready to face him.

“Do you want to go in the bedroom for a while?” he asked.