Page 60 of Chasing Honor

“I think you know how much you mean to our family. So it won’t come as a shock to you that we are thrilled to have you in our lives—in Ethan and Carson’s lives. I want you to remember that when I tell you this story. Neither Ethan nor Lenox know this, it’s the only secret I’ve ever kept from my family.” Lily checked over her shoulder before she started. “After Ethan told us Chrissy was pregnant and she wanted to give the baby up for adoption, I went to the Krier’s house to talk to Chrissy and her mom. I told Chrissy if she wanted to keep the baby, Lenox and I would help them financially. Mrs. Krier had a fit. The woman was in hysterics, saying she wanted her daughter to go to college and a child would ruin her life. She was having no part of Chrissy and Ethan keeping the baby. She stormed out of the house leaving me alone with Chrissy, who was really the person I wanted to talk to anyway. They may’ve been sixteen, but the decision was theirs, not the Krier’s nor mine or Lenox’s.

“After Chrissy calmed down, I asked her what she wanted. I told her flat out we would welcome her into our home if she wanted the baby. She admitted adoption was her choice. She was very adamant she didn’t want to be a mom. She also confided in me, she didn’t want children when she grew up either. She wanted to be a doctor and was very passionate about medicine. She is one, by the way. She was awarded a full scholarship and completed her undergrad in three years. She finished medical school and went on to do her residency in a research hospital. I don’t know why she was here, but I don’t think it’s because she wants to take Carson.”

“Ethan?”

“No. With Ethan comes Carson. This may not paint Ethan in a very good light, but he didn’t love her. He thinks I don’t know this, but Chrissy told me he asked her to marry him. I wanted to smack my son but at the same time I was proud he was trying to do what he thought was right. They could’ve raised Carson as friends, he didn’t need to marry someone he didn’t love.”

“She said no,” I told her something she obviously knew.

“She did, because she didn’t want to be tied to him or the baby. Chrissy just wanted out.”

I glanced out the window and saw Ethan and Lenox headed for the back door.

“Thank you for talking to me,” I said, knowing our time was running out.

“Anytime, sweet girl, and we’ll talk about what Carson asked when this latest shit storm blows over.” I smiled at Lily’s choice of words. It sounded like something Lenox would say. “But I have to know, is that something you want? To be Carson’s mom.”

“Very much, yes.”

“That’s what I thought.” She patted my knee and stood. “Let me help you finish cleaning up before we head home.”

We were entering the kitchen when the back door opened, and Carson came running to me.

“Are we gonna go to the park and take more picture of the giant magnolias?” Carson asked.

“As soon as we’re done—”

“Not today, Squirt. Something came up at work, and you’re gonna go with Gran and Pop to their house.”

“But, Daddy. Honor was going to let me take pictures today. Can’t she watch me while you’re at work. I always go to Gran and Pops.”

“Not today. I’m sure Honor is busy later.” Ethan turned to me, and I was brought back to the day I’d met him in the park. The stare was the same, full protective mode and a whole lot pissed off.

“We’ll do it another day, darlin’, promise. But we have to follow daddy’s rules, and he said today he wants you to go to Gran’s house. We’ll take pictures another day.”

“Fine.” Carson stomped off to the stairs.

I bit my tongue until she was out of sight, then, uncaring Ethan’s parents were in the room, I let him have it.

“Don’t you ever do that shit to me again,” I seethed.

“What shit?” he shot back with the same irritation I’d given him.

“You know what you just did. I had plans with her today. You changed your mind about letting me take her to the park. Fine. You’re her dad. But don’t blame that on me and tell her I’m busy. I’m never too busy for her, and what you did was total bullshit.”

“Bad move, son.” Lenox added.

“It seems to me everyone has forgotten I’m her father.”

Shit on a shingle, that hurt. It hurt so badly and so deeply, I couldn’t stand to be in the same room with him.

“Don’t worry, Ethan, I’ll never forget that you are her father. Lily, thanks for your help cleaning up. Lenox, it was nice seeing you.”

I hightailed it to my room and gently shut the door as the first tear fell.

Screw him!

A little while later there was a knock on my door and I was debating whether to answer it when Ethan opened it.