Page 13 of Declan

“We all have reasons for doing what we do. Autumn has her own personal reasons for not wanting to get close to her sister and I understand why. Emerson is tough, no doubt, but under all of that, she’s got a big heart, a soft spot that Thad works his ass off to protect. Emmy can’t understand why Autumn won’t walk away. Thad does understand so he’s in the middle—he wants to give his wife what she wants but he knows Autumn’s not ready, she may never be ready, and Thad’s gotta prepare Emmy for that. With all of that, I wasn’t gonna put him in a position to keep something from his woman. I also knew that with you there, you’d watch out for her so there was no need to alert anyone else.”

Zane was correct, Emerson needed to prepare. Autumn was not the sister she remembered and never would be. The sisters nearly looked identical, but that was where the similarities ended. Emmy was sweet to her core and there wasn’t a damn thing sweet about Autumn.

“And me?”

“I had my reasons.”

“You gonna share those?”

“No.”

“Just no?”

“You gotta trust me.”

What the fuck? Trust?

“You want me to trust you after you went behind my back, dug into my personal life, and sat on that information?”

“This isn’t the CIA,” he weirdly stated.

“No shit?”

“I’m not some fuckstick who’s lookin’ into your past trying to dredge up some shit to hold in my back pocket, only to pull it out to control you or use against you. I looked because I needed to know. But also because I saw a brother in so much fucking pain it oozed from him. Pain that I thought I recognized as the scars of war, of burying good men. I was wrong, your loss is worse—unimaginable. So I held onto that information until you needed me to use it. And, Declan, I’m telling you it’s time. None of those men will fully comprehend all that you lost, but they’ll get you through. Shit’s about to blow up and when it does, you’re gonna need them at your back. And when all of this is over, I suggest you carve out some time and talk to your sister. She deserves to know about her namesake.”

“Don’t go there,” I ground out. “My daughter’s off-limits.”

“She’s not, Declan. She existed. She’s a part of you. She’s a part of Violet and you need to talk to her.”

“That’s a fuck no, Zane. She’s been through enough. She’s happy, she has a family, and I’m not piling my shit on her.”

“You’re part of that family—”

“Drop it. Serious as fuck, Zane. Leave it alone.”

“Wake the fuck up, Dec. Before it’s too late. Before you’ve wasted your life. You got people all around you who care. Who would carry the load, walk through fire for you. Open your goddamn eyes.”

Zane disconnected and my head throbbed. For a man who was so smart, he was dumb as fuck. It was already too late. There was no life to waste because mine had ended in Brazil.

“You have a daughter?” Autumn whispered.

Fucking, fucking, Christ.

My hand automatically went to my chest and covered my tattoo. The only thing I had left of Violet. Searing pain shot through my body and pierced the hard shell around my heart.

“Don’t,” I warned.

“Don’t what?”

I turned and realized my mistake. I’d been so pissed when I came back inside the house I didn’t close the bedroom door.

“Don’t ask and don’t ever bring it up again.”

“Okay.”

Fucking, fucking, Christ.

There it was. The reason I was going to continue to be a selfish fuck. The reason why I didn’t care if Thad was pissed. Not a flinch, not narrowing of her eyes, no sign of hurt. She knew. Autumn knew there were things I wouldn’t ever share and she never pushed. When we hit a topic that one of us didn’t want to discuss, we moved on, neither of us questioned the other. Therefore we were free to be who we were—two broken, soulless people. And there was no guilt on either of our parts.