Page 37 of Declan

“Are you serious with this shit?”

“Deadly.”

I pinched my lips together in an effort not to tell him to go suck a bag of dicks. Who the hell did he think he was? I didn’t blindly follow orders, not even when they were given nicely. Barked at like a dog? Um, no. Just no. That wasn’t happening.

Declan pulled to a stop in front of a half-crumbled building and I glanced around. The area wasn’t deserted but it was by no means populated. Just enough cars around that we wouldn’t stand out.

“Cover—”

“What the fuck, Declan?”

“You understand we’re in Afghanistan, right? You’re a woman and you got pale skin and blonde hair. Cover that shit up.”

“Or what? You’ll lock me in the trunk?”

His gaze sliced to mine and his eyes gleamed with irritation. “Fucking hell, you’re a pain in the ass.”

“I’m the pain in the ass? Better than having a stick up my ass—which you have. A giant rod shoved up the ass that’s turned you into a total dick. You could’ve said, hey, Autumn, we’re gonna be parking soon, time to put on that ridiculously hot get-up. I know it sucks you have to sweat half to death but it won’t be for very long.” I watched as his jaw tightened and face turned to granite.

“You think this shit’s a joke? Someone seeing your hair thinking they just hit the motherload. Well, it’s not. There’s not one motherfucking thing funny about me having to kill an army of men when they try to take you from me.”

What the actual hell?

I was right, this had nothing to do with the convoy, him seeing me in my tank top and panties, or anything that had happened yesterday. This was something else entirely, and honestly, I didn’t think it actually had to do with me. Well, it did, but it didn’t. This was about Declan protecting me.

Shit. My heart squeezed.

I was too late.

Declan blamed himself for his wife and daughter dying. A man like Declan, protective through and through, would think he failed. And that failure would eat him up.

So this wasn’t about me. It was about Declan being protective and afraid he’d fail.

And because my heart ached for his loss, for the years of anguish he’d lived through, I found myself doing something I never do—I gave in. If he’d been bossing me and barking for any other reason, I would’ve told him to go fuck himself.

“I’m sorry.”

I reached for the niqab and quickly covered my hair, then pulled on the rest of the clothes and immediately started sweating. But it was mere seconds after I was cloaked in black from head to ankle with no skin showing did Declan finally exhale.

There was no apology on his part, no explanation why he’d behaved like a douche, and I wondered if he even knew why he’d been so angry. He was wound so tightly and buried all of his emotions so I doubted it. Hell, I was the same way. The last thing in the world I wanted to do was feel, therefore when I did, it pissed me off and I lashed out.

“We gotta move to plan B,” Max radioed. “I got no line of sight within distance.”

My excitement started to well. Not that I’d share with Declan I was secretly happy Max couldn’t find high ground within the radius he needed. That meant we were breaching the compound and I’d get Madeleine up close and personal.

“Copy that,” Declan returned.

He said no more because he didn’t need to. Last night we’d gone over plan A, B, and C so many times I’d be dreaming about them for months.

Dec was looking out the windshield scanning the area and I was lost in my head visualizing my place in the lineup. I’d be dead in the middle. Brooks would take point, Kyle, then me, followed by Max, and Declan would take the back. Thad would be overwatch.

“Autumn?”

“Huh?”

“I said,” he huffed impatiently. “You’re gonna have to change again.”

Right. We were no longer staying in the car. Which meant I needed to be free to move and hide weapons.