Page 60 of Cocky Brutal Sinner

“I’m done playing this stupid game,” she declares. Spinning on the heel of her purple socks, she rushes up the basement stairs and slams the door behind her. The other guys clutch their stomachs, unable to hold back their laughs.

“Looks like you’ve got a new brother-in-law, Luke!” Nate laughs.

“How’s it feel to be killing it with the fourteen-and-under crowd?” James says.

Ryan elbows me. “Seriously, dude, why you and not me? Am I not muscly enough? Is it the Italian thing?”

“Trust me, Ryan, you don’t want Brinley crushing on you,” Luke says. “She’s so fucking annoying. She’s always writing in that stupid journal. She probably doodled Brinley L. Bishop like a zillion times.”

I sink back against the couch cushions. If I can’t convince these assholes to change the subject, I’ll be hearing about this stupid crush all night. So I raise my cup. “Never have I ever wished a fourteen-year-old had a crush on me, instead.”

Ryan drinks, and the other guys turn their attention back to him. After a few minutes, they move on to debating his chances with all four of his crushes.

I find my eyes drawn back to the stairs where Brinley ran. She’s definitely embarrassed, but I hope she’s not hurting too badly. I’m pretty sure everyone will forget about the whole thing by tomorrow.

Everyone except me.

21

BRINLEY

Nine years, nine months ago

Cabinets slam downstairs in the kitchen. Boyish laughter drifts into my bedroom, even through my headphones. My stomach clenches, and I turn up the volume on my music to drown them out.

I used to love how often Luke’s friends came over. They added excitement and color to the boring nights at our house, while Dad played chess on his computer and Mom turned on TMC to watch her favorite old movies. I could usually sneak down and pretend to read a book while I watched whatever they were getting up to. Yeah, sometimes they made fun of me, but they usually just ignored me and it was more fun than sitting upstairs, alone by myself.

At least, that’s why I hung out with them at first.

Then I started to notice Beau.

Even thinking his name makes my entire head blush, my ears prickling painfully. Another laugh pierces through the music on my headphones, and my ears prickle. I just know they’re laughing about me. That’s probably the whole stupid reason they hang out here, even though most of James’s friends are right, with way cooler houses. They come here to torture me.

Or they’ve already forgotten me. After I ran out of Never Have I Ever, none of them thought about me ever again—especially him.

I smother my face against a pillow. I want to scream, or cry, or bang my head repeatedly against the wall. If I could bleach my memory of everything that happened that night, I would.

I can’t believe how stupid I was, playing their stupid game. I hate that I can’t stop replaying that terrible moment on a loop, over and over again. A little too much vodka, and I stupidly looked at him. Everyone saw it, and I hate that I gave them that.

It’s still early in the afternoon. I should sneak downstairs and go out to see a movie or something. Anything to get me out of the house and away from the ghosts of their laughter. That’s what I would do, if the idea of bumping into them on my way out the door didn’t give me actual hives.

My phone buzzes on the bed. I pick up the phone, and for the first time all night I actually smile when I see the video Eden sent me. Her phone camera is pointed at an adorable chestnut-colored horse as she scratches its neck.

“That’s my sweetie baby honey bunch. Show Brinley what a perfect little cutie you are,” Eden croons before directing the camera back at her face. “I think I might be a little too obsessed with my new horse.”

Grinning, I’m about to type a response when a notification pops up.

Beau

Are you still hiding from us?

My heart stops.

Beau is texting me.

Just me.

This has never happened. Ever. I only even have his number from the time my parents made Luke and Beau drag Eden and me along to Canada’s Wonderland with them. We started a group text in case we needed to meet up before we promptly split up, the guys going right to the roller coasters while Eden and I went off to the water park.