Page 125 of The Silversmith

And it did.

His hand dropped to his side, defeat leveling the planes of his scarred, handsome face. I heard him shifting but refused to look up.

“Take this. It’s cold.” His black leather jacket brushed my arm. “Please take this, Ella, and know I’ll be waiting for you.”

Reluctantly, I accepted and put his coat over my fur shawl because it was large enough to fit. I watched him leave in the direction of the inn.

For a while, I stood completely still, numbly watching the reflections of lanterns and firelight off the ocean waves. Hearing the joyous sounds of solstice celebrations. Laughter, cheering, singing. All of it felt separate from me now.

The mist bit at my cheeks and ruffled my dampening hair so it rippled around me and stung my face. His jacket, enveloping my body, blocked the shudders but couldn’t soothe the ache in my chest. Behind me, I heard the carefree laughter of children and turned toward the source. Three of them—two young girls and a boy—skipped across and squealed down the cobblestone path waving thin wooden sticks that sparkled with hot, dancing light.

I smiled through the ache in my chest when the boy laughed.

The little boy laughed like Ollie.

I took in the children’s sweet, unworried faces bitten pink from the cold, filled with joy. I knew my choice remained the same.

Simeon had placed wards on this city as he had Tovick to protect these innocents. But it wouldn’t last. Molochai was moving north, and he would eventually bear down on the last of Simeon’s defenses. Then, nowhere would be safe, not even Brinnea. Surely everyone in this world could not fit and survive in the Winterton Caves, if they could even be kept hidden from Molochai. None of this good would last unless I did something about it. I shouldn’t have let myself forget that, not for a single moment.

I could be furious with Gavin for the rest of our last night together. Or, I could be as grateful as I had been to Simeon when I thought it was he who knew I needed more time.

But it had been Gavin who ensured I had time and space to breathe. To adjust. Simeon, it seemed, was ready to drag me out of one prison into another. Eight or nine days was all it would have taken to bring me from Warrich to those Caves. I would be there now. I would have arrived to my people—my betrothed—weak, nimble, scared, confused. Without the strength in my body, the fire in my veins, the knowledge of the gods and their power. Had we gone straight to those Caves… I would have gone in blind.

“I think about how the people who were supposed to love and protect you starved the light and life right out of you just so they could rebuild you however they saw fit…”

I buried my face in my hands and muffled my screams. Because I knew he was right. He had lied. He was wrong, but it had been his twisted way of protecting that scared, weak, malnourished girl he’d found in Warrich. As much as I was angry at him for it…

I loved him for it too.

With a heavy sigh, I dragged my tired feet through the frigid sand. When I reached the path to the inn, I slipped my shoes back on, unsure if the discomfort was any better than bare feet on the hard, stone ground.

Minutes later, I walked into the two-story inn and down the lantern-lit, cream-tiled hallway until I stood in front of our room. I took a few deep breaths before opening the door.

Upon my entry, he rose from where he sat on the edge of the bed. The door closed softly behind me. His eyes tracked my every movement.

“You were wrong to lie to me.” I shed his jacket and the wolf pelt, laid them on the chair beside the door. “But I know you were trying to give me time to adjust to everything. To gather some semblance of autonomy before going to those Caves. So, you were wrong,” I repeated, reminding myself just as much as him, “but… I forgive you.”

His chest quivered with a relieved sigh, and he was immediately moving, reaching to pull me into his embrace. I outstretched my arms and stopped him with my palms flat on his hard chest.

“I also know there’s more you’re not telling me. And perhaps I’m a fool for it, but tonight, I don’t want to know. Tonight, I want to pretend none of the rest of it exists.”

My instinct roared a warning at me. I shoved it down into those cautious depths. I didn’t care. No, I didn’t want to care.

“Tonight, I just want you.”

There was more than one war unfolding in Nyrida, and despite my status as the prophesied savior queen of these lands, the war I cared about tonight was the war… between us.

“Aryella.” His voice was solid and resolute. He wrapped his strong fingers around my forearms. “I am not going to bed you tonight.”

Hope drained out of my pores like sweat, leaving shallow pools of panic thirsty with need.

“It feels like the only part of myself I have that’s mine,” I breathed.

“And I’m not letting you give that to me,” he answered firmly. “Not tonight.”

“But I have to go to those Caves,” I told him, pulse racing. “And at the springs, just days ago, you told me to allow myself to live, and that is what I’m trying to do tonight, with you. Because I’ve accepted that I have to go to my people and my husband—”

“He’s not your fucking husband!”