Page 59 of The Incendiary

Elias turned and walked away, leaving me laid out alone on the sparring mat, skin flushed, body confused, and stomach wracked by nausea. I stared up at the ceiling while trying to figure out what the hell had just happened.

“What’s going on down there?” Shera asked down the pathway, her tone a mix of suspicion and caution.

“Why?”

“Your thoughts are… loud again.”

I groaned, hating the effect Elias had on my body. It was there, but it felt wrong, cheap, invasive, and I didn’t want it.

I stood and massaged the tender muscles of my abdomen. What I should have done was sleep. Instead, I tried to shudder the feeling of Elias Winterton off me and tiptoed through the courtyard to the library.

After another two hours of searching and finding nothing, I slumped forward and rubbed my eyes, feeling like I’d skimmed through each book in this library twice with no progress.

I was better than I used to be at not berating myself for failing or feeling weak and useless, but I wasn’t perfect. Gavin subjected himself to four hundred years of hell to ensure I had a chance to choose my own life, but I’d sent him away and proved useless to him now. I couldn’t help but wonder if the poised, knowledgeable princess he’d once fallen in love with would’ve known exactly what to do.

“You should rest,” Shera gently reminded me. “You need your strength for tomorrow just like everyone else.”

“There has to be at least one book about magic in this library.”

“Unless your uncle took them all out long ago.”

She was probably right. Resigned to that reality, at least for tonight, I was halfway out the door before realizing I hadn’t returned the last book to its proper place. I turned back, only to pause in front of the gap between books, focusing on what looked like a crack in the wall behind the shelf.

I leaned closer and saw a subtle lip in the wood, like trim around a doorway. I snatched the few books directly below it and saw that the crack wasn’t a crack but a seam running floor to ceiling. Frantically, I scattered books across the library floor until the empty shelves revealed that the entire bookshelf was part of a hidden door.

For the first time since entering this dusty library, hope bloomed in my chest. Another room with restricted books? What else would be behind a library’s hidden door?

“I’ll find a way,” I whispered to myself. To him, wherever he was. I reached through the shelves to twist the rickety wooden knob, but it was locked, of course. “Shit.” I jiggled it to be sure, with no luck. But a few inches above the knob was an oddly shaped keyhole. Square in the center with two notches, as if the matching key was cross-shaped.

My stomach dropped, because I needed that key, and I knew exactly where it would be.

Inside Elias Winterton’s living quarters.

SEVENTEEN

GAVIN SMYTH

I want to let myself think about what life could be like for us after all of this. If “us” is even possible. But if I let myself get lost in those thoughts, I’m not sure I’ll ever leave.

—UNSENT CORRESPONDENCE FROM QUEEN ARYELLA I TO THE BUTCHER OF NYRIDA

13th of Helios, 402 Years Ago

We rode out of the city on a black horse to a small, secluded lake with clear water, surrounded by foliage. The only break in the trees was an alcove large enough to tie off the horse to feed in the grass and rest. My friend Victor and I had been coming here since we were young. I dismounted and offered both arms to lower her.

“I can get off a horse on my own, you know,” she giggled.

“I know, but let’s not pretend I’m willing to forfeit an opportunity to touch you. May I?”

Her chest brushed mine as she kissed me on the way down. She watched as I removed my shirt, biting her bottom lip at the sight of my bare torso.

“Can I touch you?” she asked breathlessly. Just when I thought my erection couldn’t get any worse…

I laughed, the sound gravelly and hoarse. “Never ask me that again.”

“Why?”

“Because the answer will always be yes.”