Page 105 of Sorrow & Strangers

“I’m light fae,” I say. It’s not new information, but it’s becoming more real every day. I have no idea what it means or what to do about it, but I need to look into it because it is becoming increasingly clear that the threat I am facing is not only to my life, but to my loved ones as well. Living in the dark has been my plan for twenty-eight years. That was fine when it was just me, but I’ve already lost one person I love because of who I am. I will not lose anyone else, and I don’t care who I have to destroy to protect them.

The halo hums again. He is obviously tapped into my thoughts, but I am not sure what he is trying to tell me.

“I don’t know what it means,” I murmur.

“You are you.” The words fill my mind along with the sense of acceptance and love that Connor has always shown me, and I can’t keep the tears from falling. He’s always known how to comfort me, and while I’m super grateful for this channel of communication with him, it hurts too.

I wake up in the same bedroom. The moment my eyes open, I sit up, the sheets pooling around my hips. I look down, and I see I am once again wearing lingerie, the same as last time. The stranger stands at the window looking out, and I glare at the back of his head.

“Gods, aren’t you bored with me yet?” I growl, not even bothering to cover myself up anymore.

His shoulders tense. “Are you?”

“Am I what?”

“Bored with me?” he asks, his posture tight.

I narrow my eyes on his back. “I feel like I’ve been very clear that I want you to leave me alone,” I grumble.

His shoulders relax, and he chuckles, still not looking at me. “You’re dreaming of the forest in Avalon tonight. Feeling trapped?”

I hate how much he’s deciphered from such an innocuous detail. As if I have a say in what appears in this dream. I have no control over this particular dream. I don’t know how he has such insight, but I won’t give him the satisfaction of asking him to clarify.

The memory of my conversation with Rafe is fresh in my mind, about how he and Connor discussed the stranger. He was worried, but he trusted me. Connor supported me, and he deserved so much better. I know I should end this, make the stranger go, but I truly don’t know if I have the strength to fight him and deny myself. Just another way I failed Connor.

“Why won’t you leave me alone?” I ask. “I don’t want this, and I don’t want you here.”

He finally glances at me over his shoulder. His expression is barely visible thanks to the avatar, but I can tell he is unaffected by my words.

“Ready to practice?”

My brows draw. “Practice?” I echo.

“You need to train your mental walls. If I can step into your dreams, so can others.”

“Are you having some kind of episode? In what world do you think I would ever train with you?”

“Why wouldn’t you?” he asks, his expression slipping into a glare.

“Is wanting you out of my life not enough of a reason?”

“No,” he says, darkness snapping off him.

I bristle. “Why?”

“You know why.” He turns to face me fully. “You face multiple threats, and you can train your body with your little gym pet, your power with your headmaster, but none of it will matter if your mental walls are paper-thin.”

My fists clench. I don’t know why it still surprises me when he knows things about me, but it does. What truly sets me on edge is the undercurrent of anger in his voice when he mentions Max. I even hear it regarding the headmaster.

“Not tonight,” I say, weariness tugging at me. “I need to rest.”

The stranger pushes off the wall and stalks over to me. He slips into the bed, making the mattress dip. He lies down, his back to me. “Rest,” he commands.

“Leave,” I growl, staring at his back and yanking at the sheets in frustration.

He shifts a little, tucking the sheet under his massive body, but otherwise, he ignores me.

I stare at his back, and my overeager mind replays the time I spent in his bed. With a sigh that sounds a little like a growl, I lie down. I so want to turn away from him, but I can’t forget what he said when he had me pinned up against the wall in his room. My lies are for everyone else. All my truths are yours and yours alone. He opened himself up to me today, and I can still sense the vulnerability he subjected himself to. I know it’s not in his nature to do this, but he did it for me.