Page 30 of Sorrow & Strangers

The absurdity of it muffles the pain slightly, and my lips twitch in response.

“Asshole males,” Alice grumbles.

My smile deepens, and my gaze flicks to the mirror, checking to see if it is actually happening. The image in front of me reflects a healing Summer.

I can tell Alice sees it too because she softens. “Now, tell him it’s girls’ night, and he needs to shush.”

My eyes flick to the halo. “I love you, Con.”

I look at myself in the mirror once more. I really do hate how thin I’ve allowed myself to get. The halo hums in silent support, but then goes quiet, and I can tell he’s gone again.

Alice wraps her arms around my waist and says, “Let’s be sad bitches.”

I nod, leaning back into her.

“Love you,” she says, squeezing me.

“I love you.”

Alice and I go downstairs, and she pours us each a shot. She hands me one. “What did I say last year? To fucking shit up?”

“No more fucking shit up,” I grumble, looking down at the amber liquid in the crystal glass.

“To no more fucking shit up,” Alice toasts, lifting her glass.

I tap my glass to hers, and we both down them. The liquor burns my throat as it slides down, taking off the edge I have been living with. It’s been so long since I drank that I immediately feel the effects, leaving me like a wool-covered dagger.

“For courage or whatever,” Alice says, refilling our glasses, and I unquestioningly down it.

Chapter Eighteen

Summer

Alice leads us to the hottest new club in Camelot. The building looks like a cathedral from the outside, its turrets high and pointing to the sky, but the beings forming the queue out the door suggest it is anything but a divine space.

She takes my hand, and we stride past them all, walking straight to the front of the line. She doesn’t even have to say anything. The bouncer simply unclips the velvet barrier and allows us entry. The second we breach the door, the music thuds through my body, rattling my bones.

Alice pulls me through the mass of people, weaving through the bodies plastered to each other as we push toward the bar. The haze from the shots we downed before leaving makes it so I don’t even mind the contact. I’m not drunk, just a little warmer and friendlier.

At the bar, Alice immediately gets the attention of not one, but two bartenders, and promptly orders us two more shots each. I down them both easily and savor the blissful feeling of all my emotions dulling. I can breathe again.

Alice takes my hand and leans in to be heard over the roar of the music. “Dance?”

I nod, and she pulls me through the mass of people again to what feels like the center of the dance floor, but I really have no idea. This club is so big. I sway to the music, allowing it to flow through me. The ghosts of the past press against my body, but thanks to the alcohol, I don’t feel the burden of them quite so much.

When Alice spins me out, I stumble, and I’m surprised when a small laugh escapes me. Alice’s eyes brighten a little at the sound. It was nothing more than a soft giggle, quiet and light, but her vampiric hearing allows her to hear it even over the beat of the music, and I can see it fills her with joy.

We’re approached several times by males trying their luck, but Alice always protects me. She either pushes them away or flashes her fangs and hisses at them. We dance, allowing ourselves to let loose, to be free, to be young and unburdened. Just for a little while.

Alice spins me out again, but this time I slam into a wall of hard muscle. A pair of large hands grip my hips in an almost familiar way. “Fuck. I’m sor—” I begin, looking up to have my gaze lock with Max’s deep brown eyes.

Shit.

The last time I saw Max was terrible. I barely remember it now, but I remember being truly awful to him and the sound of him slamming the front door as he left.

He’s gone.

His words echo through my brain, even though I know it wasn’t his fault. None of it was.