Page 106 of She’s Worth the Risk

“She wants a shot with you, me, and Priya.”

We glance to where Priya is engrossed in conversation with a friend, giggling as she sips from her paper cup. Marcus sighs happily.

“Let’s give her a minute.”

I watch as he gazes at her lovingly, my heart full. It was an honor to be part of their wedding day, and even more meaningful since Marcus and I cleared the air between us. For the first time in years, I feel close to my brother, and that means more to me than I could have imagined. I won’t let that distance grow between us again.

“I like Zinnia,” Marcus says. “She seems good for you.”

My gaze slides to my beautiful girl, deep in thought as she looks across at Manhattan, glittering in the late afternoon sun. She was delighted when I invited her to Marcus’s wedding, but ever since that conversation at his house, I haven’t been able to shake the thought that our relationship might have an expiration date.

“She is,” I agree.

“I’m pretty sure she’s okay with me now.” Marcus chuckles. “I talked her around.”

I frown, looking at my brother. “What do you mean?”

“I thanked her for helping you open up, and she looked like she was going to punch me again. Told me you had a good reason to be closed off.”

I issue a quiet laugh, glancing down at my cup. Of course she did. She’s been fiercely defensive from the moment I told her about Marcus. Not only with him—with me, getting me to draw. To let her in. To let life in.

Marcus pats me affectionately on the shoulder. “She’s a good one, Nick.”

There’s a tug in my heart as I look back at Zinnia. She’s not just a good one—she’s the best one. The only one.

Zinnia glances over, as if sensing my gaze on her, and sends me a warm smile. It burrows under my ribs, deep into my chest. I swallow hard, throat growing tight as I gaze at her. As I finally let myself acknowledge the knowing that’s been hovering at the edge of my consciousness for weeks.

I love her.

I feel things for Zinnia I didn’t even know I could feel. For the first time in decades, I’m happy and full and hopeful. Alive, in a way I didn’t know was possible. I can’t imagine how my life would look if I hadn’t met her.

How it would look if she left.

“I know it’s complicated,” Marcus adds quietly, “but you need to figure it out. Do what you have to do to make it work.” His eyes are dead serious when they meet mine. “You’d be a fool to let her get away.”

Zinnia turns back to stare at the city, her expression growing wistful again, and my heart twists.

Marcus is right. I can’t let her get away. I need her with me, more than I’ve ever needed anything. I need a genuine relationship with her, out in the open, where we can be together without worrying. No more hiding, no more sneaking around.

And if I want that, I know what I have to do.

I have to come clean to the university. If I’m lucky, they’ll understand the circumstances. If I’m lucky, I won’t lose my career.

That thought should terrify me, but it doesn’t. Not nearly as much as the thought that, even if I do all that, Zinnia might not want to stay.

We wrap up shortly after, and get a cab back to my place, stopping only so Zinnia can pop into a drugstore. She’s quiet on the drive home, even more so as we enter my apartment, and my gut is in knots.

Maybe this is why I couldn’t admit to myself how I feel. I was too scared of how much it would hurt when she decided to leave.

We kick off our shoes, and Zinnia turns to lean against the counter, taking my hands in hers. “Nick,” she murmurs softly. “There’s something I have to tell you.”

My stomach plummets.

Shit, already? I figured we at least had until the end of the semester, but was I kidding myself?

It was the wedding, wasn’t it? The emotion, the longing glances from me. Was it too much? Does she somehow know I spent every second wondering what it would be like to say those words to her, to make sure she’d never want to leave?

I’ll be gone by Labor Day.