Page 4 of Hexes From Exes

“Don’t have time,” Rick lied.

Zed gave him a knowing look. “You got summoned? Rad, what’s the assignment?” Zed said instead of pushing his friend any further on his ‘busy schedule’.

Rick shrugged. “Typical - a group of guys against some woman. They say she cheated or something. Pretty run of the mill.”

“Ah, what did they want? Warts? A goat headed baby?” asked Zed excitedly. Zed was into old school punishments, it’s why they’d been phasing him out of taking assignments that came through the pipeline. It was rare to be summoned directly as Rick was, that meant a word-of-mouth referral. Otherwise, assignments came from a giant glass tube that spat out paperwork onto Herschel’s desk, where he divvied them up between whoever was free. Lately they’d all been free, which was a problem within itself.

“No, it was kind of clever. They want her to love someone she can never have,” said Rick with a chuckle. At last, the laptop booted onto the home screen, and he popped open the internet browser.

“Hell, no wonder your laptop is so slow. What are all these tabs?” Zed exclaimed.

“Research,” Rick muttered.

“You know you can bookmark these? To find later?” Zed said.

“If I bookmark them, I’ll forget they’re there,” Rick argued, feeling his temper flair.

Zed raised his hands in a mock surrender. “Hey, just trying to help you out man.” He disappeared into his cubicle for a moment, returning on his rolling chair to sidle up next to Rick.

“Let’s see this girl. You said a group of guys? Exes?”

Rick nodded and pulled up his social media accounts, typing her name into various ones until he found her.

“Stephanie Porter, CEO and founder of Eternal Beauty Systems,” read Zed. They found an article of her at a local children’s hospital, presenting a large check to help fund a wing of the hospital. Zed let out a low whistle at the picture. “That’s no girl. That’s a woman,” he said. “Hubba hubba!”

Rick had no idea what that meant, probably some bit of human culture. Zed was obsessed with bootlegged human entertainment despite it being off limits in Anathamea. Contraband existed, but if Zed was found with any of it, he’d quickly be terminated - or worse.

Stephanie Porter had a wide smile on her face, mostly hidden by the ridiculously sized check. The number on the check was impressive, Rick noted, and specifically given for the hospital to build a wing. Her face was pretty enough for a human. She had an olive skin tone and dark black hair that fell to just below her collarbones. She had dark brown eyes and thick, pouty lips. Another photo further down showed the trend of thick continuing - she had wider hips and big breasts with strong thighs and thick calves that were accentuated by her heels.

“I like a demoness with some bulk to her,” Zed said as they looked through her social media, which was mostly just ads for her latest products. It was hardly personal; if anything it was a social media for her company that just had her name and face on it on occasion. “You know, some of these younger demonesses are so frail, it makes me worry for them.”

“You know why the younger generation is so frail,” argued Rick, rolling his eyes. “This was a bust, it’s impossible to find out anything about this woman from the internet.”

“Guess you’re going to have to go the old fashion way - some leg work. Want company?” Zed asked hopefully.

Rick shook his head. “Nah, I’ll go alone. If I need you, I’ll call.” He closed the laptop without exiting out of any of the numerous tabs, making Zed frown.

“Where you going?” asked Zed.

“Back to bed,” Rick said, pushing away from the desk.

“Bed? Like a nap? It’s the middle of the day,” Zed said, his voice dropping to a whisper. His gaze darted to Herschel at his desk just a few feet away. If he knew that Rick was out of the office sleeping instead of researching or enacting the revenge and claiming payment from humans he’d be in huge trouble. Anathamea depended on demons like Rick to collect magic and keep them all alive.

“Well, I’m tired,” Rick said irritably.

“Are you tired or are you depressed?” Zed pressed.

Rick shot him a loaded glare. “I’m not depressed - I just don’t sleep well, so I have to take a lot of naps to make up for it.”

“I’m pretty sure that’s depression,” Zed argued back. “Is it because of Cass?” he added.

“Don’t say her fucking name here,” Rick hissed under his breath.

“Look, I’m just saying - it’s been nearly two years. I get it, you were pretty much bonded. And you have to see her nearly every day…” Zed trailed off. “I told you not to shit where you eat, man. Not that I’m blaming you, just that maybe you’re a little depressed because of the breakup and you never really gave yourself time to grieve. You jumped right into case after case and…well, it’s bound to catch up.”

“You need to stop watching those human talk shows,” Rick replied, unwilling to admit that Zed was right. The breakup with Cass was still fresh, even though it’d been nearly two years, and every time he saw her, it was another punch in the gut. He’d just gotten to the point where he wasn’t bringing her up multiple times a day or waiting for someone else to mention her so he could talk about her. Not in a negative way. He had nothing but the best things to say about her. He just missed her, was that so wrong?

“That’s not it, I just don’t sleep well,” Rick doubled down.