Page 142 of Sunrise & Serenity

CHAPTER 36

HOLDEN

Graham’s sedan disappears down the driveway in a spray of dust and gravel. Even after the sound fades, neither of us speaks.

Sage stands a couple of feet away from me, her arms folded tightly across her chest, eyes on the ground.

The ranch is strangely quiet all of a sudden. Just the wind moving through the trees and the distant clang of metal near the barns.

I stay where I am. Right now, I can’t make myself move any closer.

Twelve months in Europe.

Very prestigious.

The words scrape at something raw inside me every time I replay them.

Exhaling, she presses her fingers to her temples. “I can’t believe he came all the way here.”

I nod once absently, my brain stuck on the other part of this.

She never mentioned it. Not once.

How long has she been carrying it around while I’ve been letting myself think things I had no right thinking? Like her staying. Like this becoming something real enough to last.

I shift the rope higher on my shoulder. “How long have you known?”

Her expression tightens. She knows exactly what I’m asking.

“Just over a week.”

Relief is a trickle, not a flood. Not weeks. Not the entire time. Guess that explains why she’s been distracted lately. “Were you going to mention it?”

Her gaze drops for a beat before returning to mine. “I was trying to figure it out first.”

Tension pulls at the base of my neck, sending a dull ache through my skull. “So there was a chance you were never going to tell me?”

Hurt flashes across her face, replaced quickly by anger. “That’s not fair.”

I laugh quietly under my breath, scanning the corrals. If I keep looking at her, this conversation will probably get worse before it gets better. “Feels pretty fair from where I’m standing.”

She uncrosses her arms and steps toward me. “Holden⁠—”

“Did you apply before you got here?”

Wetting her lips, she searches my face. “It was the first week I was here. Because it was something I always wanted to do.”

Was.

My chest keeps latching onto that word, even while the rest of me’s preparing for the opposite. I take in the view of the fields, then shake my head once. “You should go.”

Her brows pull together. “What?”

“To Milan.” The words taste bitter on my tongue.

The wounded expression that flashes across her face lands like a knife in my gut.

“That’s what you got out of this?”