Page 117 of Lucky 22

My breath shakes as I exhale, relief and fear tanglingtogether. “You really mean that?”

He lifts my chin, so I have to look at him. His eyes aresteady. Certain.

“I love you,” he says simply. “And I’m proud of you. And Iwant to be the guy standing beside you while you become everything you’re meantto be. Not the reason you didn’t.”

The tears spill then, but they’re quiet.

I lean into him, and he wraps his arms around me, pulling meinto his chest. I breathe him in—warm skin and his natural scent that is betterthan any cologne and something that feels like home.

For the first time since the email arrived, I feel like Ican breathe.

“Thank you,” I whisper into his shirt.

“There’s nothing to thank me for,” he murmurs, kissing thetop of my head. “Go remind the world who you are.”

I smile, but I’m still not convinced this is the rightdecision. My gut is telling me it’s not. I open my mouth to tell him that, butno words come out.

The light knock on the door interrupts the moment, andChristian is immediately on his feet and going to get our dinner. We set it upon the small dining table in the suite, and once we’re both seated, I’m oddlyrelieved when the topic of conversation turns to apartments.

“I know you’ve had a lot on your mind with the auditionoffer,” he says as he cuts into his steak. “But did you have any time toresearch apartments?”

“I did. I even set up a few tours for tomorrow morning so wecan look at them together.”

The smile he gives me shows how happy he is that I planned itthat way. “Awesome. I don’t have to be at the stadium until one, and then wefly out on Thursday for our game in Boston.” He pauses. “Tell me about theseapartments. Do you have a favorite? Any one in particular that you like morethan the others?”

We talk about places to live, our dinner, and his gameschedule—and we do it as if I’m going to be in LA for the next week or two.

I don’t correct him because…well…because I don’t.

I can’t.

I need to sleep on it.

Yes. That’s what I need, to settle everything in my mindonce and for all. A good night’s sleep will put everything into perspective.

We look at three different apartments and decide thethird one is our favorite.

I use that term loosely because it’s temporary. Christianbelieves this move will only be for this season, so we pick the place we likeout of the ones we toured and sign the lease. When we get back to the hotel, wearrange to have all our stuff packed and shipped from Toronto.

“Good thing you’re going back to LA this week,” Christiansays with a small laugh as he gets ready to head to the stadium.

“Um…why?”

“So we can check out of the hotel. By the time we’re bothback, hopefully some of our things will have arrived from Canada. I know younever travel with much, so you’ll need more than what’s in your carry-on.”

He’s got a point.

I let out a long breath and follow him across the room as hegathers his bag and gear for today’s game.

“So, I was thinking…”

Before I can say more, his phone rings. Pulling it from hispocket, he groans quietly. “I’m sorry, but I need to take this. It’s one of thetrainers.” He absentmindedly kisses my cheek. “I’ll see you at the game,right?”

“Why is the trainer calling you?”

He looks at the phone and then at me, but I know where hisattention is. “It’s nothing, I’m sure, but…”

“Go,” I tell him as I sit back down on the sofa. Christianwalks away from me, speaking softly into the phone, and I don’t take it as agood sign. I watch as he moves around the suite, pacing slowly, and I get asinking feeling that things aren’t any better.