Page 13 of Little Bite of Bliss

“I fell in love with a guy named Ian when I was a teen a little over ten years ago,” I said. “A human who couldn’t see monsters. Because I’d grown up in a world where everything monsters do is normal, I thought mating bites were normal. I did not realize how serious they were or that it was something that really only worked for fated mates.”

Her golden eyes softened with sadness. She pressed her lips together as she listened.

It wasn’t easy to talk about any of this, but it was the reason I never thought I’d be sitting here. It was why I struggled with my father. It was why I struggled to exist as myself sometimes.

I drew in a breath and continued. “I swore up and down that he was the one. My dad insisted that he was not my mate, though. So, of course, being rebellious, I decided to prove him wrong. I bit my human boyfriend. Of course he was not my mate. So instead of finding the one, I bit someone who was definitely not human hard enough that he had to go to the hospital. The Barista was able to smooth everything over, I changed schools, I apologized to Ian, but the damage was already done. It was humiliating and horrifying. I’d never felt so ashamed. I was so angry with myself.” My voice was now a whisper, everything inside me shrinking.

What if she hated me for this?

“You were so young,” she said. “How could you possibly have known? Especially if your parents hadn't told you.”

“I should've known. There really isn’t an excuse. I’ve spent a lot of time working through what I did. Even though I had his consent to bite him, he didn’t know what I was really trying to do,” I said. “I should not have bitten someone just to prove my dad wrong. I should not have tried to push for something that deep down, I knew wasn’t true anyway. I just wanted a mate, you know? I wanted what my dads had.”

I swallowed hard, thinking back to it all. Even my sister had been furious with me.

“It was such a mess. And then everyone treated me differently, and that only made my relationship with my dad more strained. Dante and I kept bumping heads and it created a divide in our family. Even though Inferna and my other dad tried to make it better, things are still weird between us. I love my family, though.”

Leni pressed her lips together. “You fucked up. Mistakes are very normal, and while that mistake was a bad one, I’m certain you’ve put in the work to make up for it.”

“I’ve tried,” I said. A tired, bitter laugh left me. “I actually got an email from that guy a couple years ago. He ended up being mated to a werewolf and was very much part of our monster world after all. He told me everything was fine and he hoped my life was good.”

When I’d gotten that email, I wasn’t sure if it helped me or not. I’d been convincing myself I didn’t deserve love. I didn’t deserve to be wanted. The moment I started getting feelings for someone, I ran the other way.

This time felt different.

I had a feeling if I ran, Leni would chase me. I liked the idea of being caught by her.

“Unfortunately, parents make as many mistakes as regular people do. I wish that they were perfect, but it's impossible to be so.” She wrinkled her nose and grabbed a cookie from the tin, biting into it. “I’ve fucked up plenty of times in my life. Some decisions were far worse than your mistake.”

We sighed together. For a moment, I worried that I’d ruined the vibes, but her tail curled around my ankle, comforting me.

“Maybe now that I understand this fated mate feeling a little bit more, I can have a conversation with him,” I said, thinking about how that might go. “Although, he owes me a fucking apology.”

“I’m sure he does.” She thought about my words for a few seconds then leaned forward, propping her face up with her hand. When she looked at me, all my worries suddenly evaporated.

She was beautiful. I envied artists and their ability to capture people with paint, because I wanted to have her face on a canvas above my bed, always looking at me.

“I think it's worth having the conversation if you would like to have a stronger relationship with him. But no one is required to keep family in their life. I do not speak to my family. I have long since been cast out of that riddle of sphinxes, and it will be like that for the rest of my life. They don’t like me.”

“Why?” I asked. “You're lovely. You're perfect. How could they possibly not like you?”

Leni chuckled and shrugged her shoulders. “My family is very secluded. Almost like a cult, honestly. The closest comparison I have are human religious groups that isolate themselves from the rest of the world. That is how my family is. They do not think sphinxes should interact with other monsters, or humans for that matter.”

“But why?” I asked.

“Well, sphinxes hold knowledge that has been deemed sacred. Some have the gift of prophecy. They are meant to protect that knowledge, as has been done for eons. But I've never had an interest in that. Of course I love to read, and I love to learn new things, and I do all the time—but my desires never aligned with what they wanted. Because of that we fought a lot. I was never good enough. I was never enough.”

I scowled. The idea of anyone making her feel that way made my spine stiffen. “That’s such bullshit.”

I wasn’t really sure I could fight a whole family of sphinxes, but I kind of wanted to try now.

“I’m sorry your family is awful,” I said. “Even with the complicated relationship, I know I’m loved.”

“It’s okay. I’ve long since let it go.” Leni’s gaze narrowed on me. “All of my sacred knowledge is about sex. It can’t get much better than that.”

I laughed and lifted my mug. “To sacred knowledge and sex.”

Her face lit. She clinked her cup against mine. “To sacred knowledge and sex.”