Page 230 of Power Play

“Charm.”

“I dropped something.”

He didn’t answer immediately, and I hated how suspicious silence sounded when it came from him.

Then he said, “Fuck this.”

I froze. “What?”

“Fuck this dinner. Fuck the dress. Fuck whatever performance you’re about to go put on because your father decided your life belongs to him.”

My temper sparked instantly. “Ryan.”

“No, I’m serious.”

“You don’t get to talk about my family like that.”

“Why?”

“Because they’re my family.”

“And?”

I stared at the wall as his voice hardened.

“It sucks that your brother died, mi hada. It fucking sucks, and I mean that. But you aren’t required to live Charles’s life for him at the expense of your own.”

The words struck exactly where I didn’t want them. “You don’t understand.”

“Then explain it.”

“I can’t explain twenty-three years to you before a hockey game.”

“You don’t have to. I understand enough to know they turned his death into a reason you’re supposed to be perfect forever.”

“That’s not fair.”

“Neither is what they do to you.”

My breathing changed. “They love me.”

“I didn’t say they don’t.”

“You sound like you hate them.”

Ryan gave a humorless laugh. “They sound like pendejos.”

“Don’t.”

“Charm.”

“You don’t get to hate them without knowing them.”

The silence on the other end sharpened. When Ryan spoke, his voice had dropped into something far more dangerous than yelling.

“But it’s okay for them to hate and judge me without knowing me?”

I stopped.