Page 398 of Power Play

“Me, everyone, and maybe yourself.” Her hands struck my chest. “You made sure I saw what leaving looked like. You ripped the key from my ring. You locked the door before I reached the stairs. You left the group chat, went to Flint, and made everyone understand how finished you were. You turned it into a performance so nobody could question you without looking like they were betraying you.”

My hand closed around her wrist. “You don’t know shit.”

“I know I hurt you.”

“You don’t know shit!” I released her and slammed my hand against my chest. “You have no fucking clue what this did to me because I made damn sure it couldn’t reach you. You put your pain on display so I would see it. Every time Briggs’s phone went off, there you were. Every update about you crying, not sleeping, not eating, and falling apart reached me. Bliss and Aura made sure everyone knew, and everyone made sure I knew. I couldn’t escape what losing me did to you even after I left the group chat so I wouldn’t have to see your name.”

I struck my chest again, harder.

“But me? You got fucking silence. You never heard when I broke. You never saw what it took to keep walking away from you because even after you gutted me, I protected you from what you did. Trust me, Charm, I saved you. If I’d let you see what losing you did to me, you wouldn’t be standing here asking me for another chance. You’d know you had no fucking right.”

Her anger faltered. “Ryan—”

“No. You wanted the truth, so take it. You know I left. You know I took my key, shut the door on you, and ended any fucking chance of us happening again. You know I stopped answering because that is the part I let you see. You don’t know what it cost me to stay gone.”

“I know you fought Briggs.”

“You heard that I fought Briggs. You don’t know why.”

“He followed you to Flint.”

“He followed me because my boys knew exactly what trusting you cost me, and not one of them tried to talk me into taking you back.”

“I never asked them to.”

“You asked them to carry your messages.”

“Because you wouldn’t answer me!”

“I am done!”

“You aren’t done. You’re hurt.”

“Stop telling me what I am!”

“You’re hurt, and you turned that pain into a decision nobody was allowed to question.”

“I begged them to understand that I meant it.”

“Why did you have to beg if you were so sure?”

The question landed too close to something I refused to show her. I closed the distance until she had to tip her face back to look at me.

“Because they love you. Because they knew how much I loved you, and every one of them was waiting for the moment I broke and went back. I needed them to understand that loving you stopped being safe for me.”

“So you needed them to hold you to it.”

“I needed my family.”

“You needed protection from me.”

“Yes.”

The answer tore across her face.

“Do you have any idea what it feels like to hear that?” she demanded.

“Do you have any idea what it took for me to say it?”