Page 51 of Dark Surrender

“You’re my dad, sure. But…”

“No.” Setting his phone on the cushion beside him, Dad sits forward on the couch. “You aren’t fuckin’ doin’ that. We’re your family. You stay as long as you need. Kali will go apeshit if you disappear again. As will Lily. You owe it to your daughter not to go. She’s loved layin’ in bed with you this week, watchin’ movies on your phone.”

I loved it, too.

Having my kid with me, talkin’ up a storm about kid shit and shit I’ve missed on account of me leaving in the first place. Since I’ve been gone, Lily’s switched from a Coraline obsession to Hocus Pocus, and now she wants a black cat named Binx. It’s the only thing she’s talked about. If Abby doesn’t mind, I plan on getting her one. But I gotta talk to her first to make that happen. I’m not gonna just show up with a black ball of fur and expect her to take care of it without asking.

I stuff both hands in my front pockets. “I’ll make you a deal. You take me to my ride, and I’ll find a hotel in town to stay.”

“No.”

“Pops.”

“Are you too thick-headed to hear what I said? I said, no.”

“Listen, I don’t wanna have it out with you. I’m done fightin’. I’m tired. I just don’t wanna be here.” This isn’t my home, and it’s awkward as hell, having to eat dinner with your dad and his wife when said wife used to be yours. Kali’s been nothing but hospitable. I’d expect nothing less from her. She’s a good woman.

“Are you still in love with her?” Pops asks, not to be a dick. I can tell he cares.

“Your wife?”

“Yeah.”

“I’ll always love her. She was my wife first. But no, I’m not in love with her anymore.”

“Then there’s no reason you can’t stay. You ain’t like you were. I can see it. All of us can.”

“Right. I love bein’ the focus of y’all’s talks.”

“What do you expect? You up and left, we barely heard from you, and then I get a call from my old lady, sayin’ my son might be dead because he got himself caught up in the wrong shit.”

To prove a point, I pat my chest in a spot that hasn’t been torn the fuck up. “Not dead.”

Pops rolls his eyes. “Yeah… I know… and thank fuck for that. Now, I’ll make ya a deal. I’ll take ya to your bike, but I’m ridin’ it home.” When I open my mouth to argue, Pops’ glare shuts me up. “I’m gonna grill steaks tonight, and over dinner we’ll talk this shit through, as a family.”

“What is there to talk through?”

“You leavin’ and where you’re goin’.”

“We don’t need an awkward family dinner for that.”

“I do. You’re my kid. Give me this… Please.”

Christ.

Gripping the back of my neck, I inhale a giant breath that expands my chest, thus tightening the stitches. The bite of pain grounds me.

“Fuck. Fine,” I relent on a grumbly exhale.

Pops slaps his knees and uses them to stand. “Now go get your boots on so we can get your bike.”

Rolling my eyes like I’m a teenager bein’ put in his place by his father, not a grown-ass man over forty, I do as I’m told, for his sake, not mine. Pops was obviously waiting for me to come down to chat. He’s the only one here for a reason. Kali’s probably working.

Once I snag my phone, a hoodie, and put on my boots, I meet Pops outside, where he’s already sitting in the driver’s seat of his white cleaning van.

We don’t say much on the first half of the ride. Music makes for a solid buffer, as do my preoccupied thoughts… that drift back to…

“You think she’s still at the cabin?” I ask Pops as I stare out the side window at the blurry world goin’ by.