Page 90 of Dark Surrender

Not wanting to encroach on her after-shower routine, which, from my experience, is a woman’s self-care time, I gather my dirty clothes and leave her be. With the towel secured around my waist, I pay my bike a visit, snatch the change of clothes from my saddlebag, and stuff my dirty ones inside to wash later.

By the time I’m done doing what I gotta do, Iris still hasn’t emerged from the bathroom, so I pop a squat on the couch to watch television.

There’s a knock on the door when Cell, Kali, and Till return. This time, I let them in, and the four of us chat in the living room as we wait for my woman to finish.

“What is taking so long?!” Cell hollers loud enough that Iris should be able to hear her in the bathroom, or the alley out back, or the moon. This woman has a set of pipes on her.

Iris doesn’t respond. Not a peep.

Well… fuck.

Maybe I was wrong about the self-care routine, and she’s having a bathroom crisis. Before Cell can stick her nose where it doesn’t belong, I leave them to their conversation about the best ice cream toppings and gently knock on the bathroom door.

“Sweetheart?”

“I’m fine,” Iris croaks.

Iris

The door to the bathroom opens, and the sexiest man in a fresh pair of clothes walks in to find me on the floor, still naked, sobbing like an idiot.

Worry etches the lines around his eyes as Dark drops to the ground and pulls me into his arms, my head on his chest. “What’s wrong?”

That’s it. I don’t know.

Maybe I was worried he was gonna leave again after what happened? He’s had his fair share of women. Sure, he might say all the right stuff, most of the time, but men do that, don’t they? They lie to get into bed with a woman. He called me his. They build you up to tear you down.

When he left the bathroom and I heard the front door, I assumed he had run out again.

By the time the television turned on, I was already on the floor, halfway through this meltdown.

Now that the women are here, I’m not even close to presentable. There’s this… ache in my chest, and if that wasn’t bad enough, my clit is so sensitive. Too sensitive. Washing it turned me on. I’ve never experienced that before. Just as I’ve never used a man to get me off.

That’s what I did.

Used him.

That’s not me. I don’t do that—use people.

Don’t get me wrong. I’ve used men when they’re my marks, but that’s part of the job. That’s what Dark did, too, isn’t it? Use women? Am I one of those destined to have the same outcome? Another notch in Dark’s bedpost. Even if we didn’t have sex, it sure feels like we did in a way.

Dark cuffs his hand around the back of my neck. “Iris. Ya gotta give me somethin’ here.”

I tuck my knees closer to my chest, essentially turning into a ball in his lap. “I’m sorry.”

“For what?”

“Using you.”

“When did you use me?”

“You know what we did. What I did…” I trail off so I don’t have to say it. He knows what went down.

“Yeah, I do, and it was hot. You can’t use someone who consented. I got off, too. Remember? Is that what you’ve been doin’ in here, worrying about what happened?”

“I thought you left again.” I hide my face against his pec, hoping that’ll somehow stop me from feeling this way.

“I didn’t and I won’t.”