Page 40 of The Sole Love

Mr Bennet liked the young gentleman more and more. It was clear that he could not wait a second longer to see Elizabeth, his haste betraying his feelings for her. He wondered whether he had ever felt the same. But lately, remembering his youth had become fatiguing. He preferred not to think, as anger and disappointment filled his memories. In the days to come, he would have to deal with those feelings. But first, he wanted to reach Pemberley, where he could find seclusion and time alone to reflect on the past and the future.

“Ladies, Elizabeth, show Miss Darcy and Mr Darcy our new gazebo.”

Mr Bennet was proud of the little structure he had ordered built in the back garden. He intended to spend summer mornings and evenings there and even take dinner amid the trees and flowering shrubbery.

Miss Darcy, surrounded by four new friends, ran into the house in a burst of general laughter and happy noise, ignoring Mr Bennet’s invitation.

Only Mr Darcy looked at Mr Bennet for approval. And the kindness he saw in the older gentleman’s eyes gave him the courage to offer Elizabeth his arm as they strolled together towards the back of the house.

Mr Bennet was not worried about his daughter’s honour, as he was sure that the next time she returned to Longbourn, she would be a guest. His eyes followed the couple with love and a little sadness; he was not yet prepared to lose Elizabeth, yet that was life. He loved Jane with tenderness, while Elizabeth had become, especially during the last few years, his partner in conversation, sharing his love of books. And to his great joy, she had chosen a man who could appreciate those qualities.

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“It seems that only we shall be enjoying the pleasure of Mr Bennet’s gazebo,” Mr Darcy said, and Elizabeth discovered traces of the irony he had used so easily in the past. She was about to answer with the same sarcasm she had once relied upon. But she remembered the haste with which he had left the carriage and the intensity of his gaze when he first saw her. He was teasing her now, and she must learn to accept it and answer without quarrelsome intentions.

This was a game now, not a war. Perhaps this was the love she had waited for so long.

“Yes, our love for nature is well known,” she replied, smiling. Then she stopped and tried to remove her hand from his arm. To her surprise, he held it more firmly.

He fixed his eyes on hers, thinking she had somehow been offended by his words. Discussing things with Elizabeth was not always easy. However, he had no intention of letting her dash away from him or even remove her hand, as he adored feeling her so close.

“Let us stroll and admire the beautiful day. I shall not let you leave this delightful landscape.” His voice was as decided as his gesture had been.

“I just wanted to face you. I have a question.”

He nodded and gestured towards the elegant structure of white-painted wood resembling delicate lace, where Mr Bennet could hide from the rest of the household. Darcy silently thanked Mr Bennet for providing such a convenient refuge.

He wondered whether, in twenty years or so, he too would have a gazebo in the park where he could hide from the prying eyes of his wife and children. However, he could not answer himself, as the image of ‘his wife’ invaded his thoughts. She was the woman beside him who made him frantic and blissfully happy at the same time. He wanted her as he had never wanted another woman. Still, she would never be easy to win, not even after twenty years of marriage.

They entered the gazebo, and while he helped her sit, he brought her hand to his lips and kept it there. Both were excited by this new closeness in which they had discovered delightful new feelings.

Darcy was a man; alone or with his cousin Fitzwilliam, he had experienced all the adventures that a man of his position was encouraged to have before marriage. However, Elizabeth awakened feelings he had never known. There was a deep need to be with her forever, and not only in his bed. To have her beside him in all the circumstances of life excited him equally. It was a fulfilment he had never experienced, accustomed as he was only to the exploits of the bedroom.

Elizabeth, on her part, was like a rosebud, magnificent in her candour, discovering love as she had never imagined it to be. It was not as the ladies she knew had described it, but rather a realm of sensations and urges that were completely new. Her body responded to his with an impatience and desire she had never known before, her senses flourishing at his mere touch.

“Speak,” he whispered, afraid he would lose control and make her his own right there in her father’s nook.

She gently withdrew her hand and turned to face him.

“At Netherfield…” she said, and he invited her to continue with a nod.

“When I arrived that morning last autumn to see Jane, were you embarrassed because of my mud-covered petticoat and the fact that I had walked all the way from Longbourn?”

She appreciated the way he reflected on her question. She was not going to receive a quick, formal answer, but his true opinion.

“Embarrassed? No. You were a virtual stranger to me then. Your actions did not affect me in that way. But…I was confused.”

“You were?”

“Yes, certainly. I admired you—”

Elizabeth blushed, yet she interrupted him. “Admired? How is that possible? You had only met me a short time before that.”

“Well, Miss Elizabeth, it seems that this kind of feeling does not need years to form. On the contrary, I would say it springs to life violently after only a few moments of knowing someone.”

“You were confused because you admired me and I was behaving in that way?” Her tone was harsher than she would have wished. She did not intend to confront him but to disperse the clouds of the past.

Mr Darcy sighed, and it was so unexpected and intense that she feared she might have crossed a forbidden line.