Page 54 of Rich and Rotten

“Don’t do that.”

I sipped my drink again. “Do what?”

He picked up his bourbon slowly, lifting the glass to his thick lips and taking a sip, never wincing because we both knew bourbon puts hair on your chest––especially the specified-aged bourbon he requested.

“Pretend that this doesn’t mean something to you.”

Pressing my lips together and setting my glass back down, I fixed the end of the table curtain, desperate for anything to distract me.

“I don’t have to pretend, Nazir. This is a dinner…a business dinner with my security.”

“Damn.”

The words hit harder than I wanted them to. Before I could try to fix things, the food arrived at the table. The heat from the plates created a barrier between us while the chef sliced and salted the Kobe A5 Wagyu ribeye in front of us.

Before he left, he thanked us for dining at the restaurant tonight and explained the way he cooked the steak. Apparently, whenever someone ordered this particular cut of beef, the chef would come out to properly slice and salt it for you. Everything was family-style, so we shared the side dishes. Nothing was to be touched by us because once the chef excused himself, two other staff member came to properly plate our food.

As they served us, Nazir leaned back with his arm still draped around the booth, and his drink in his other hand. He nodded to signal what he did or did not want.

When they were gone, I bowed my head to say grace and then cut into the steak. I’ve had my fair share of Wagyu, but the way this one was cooked should have been illegal. It was butter-soft and melted in my mouth as I chewed.

“So, have you ever been here before?”

He finally leaned forward, shrugging his shoulder. “A few times. Nothing like this, though.”

I continued to busy myself with my food. “Like what? This restaurant? It’s certainly an experience.”

“I’ve been here before.”

My eyes finally found their way to his.

“Like sitting across from you…someone I lost. In this seat, staring at how beautiful you look tonight, it’s even more confirmation that I still want us more than I want to breathe, Tata.”

That damn lump reappeared, and my vision slightly blurred. Not because of tears, but because this was something I had envisioned for years. What would a dinner with Nazir Kane look like?

It was easier to pretend I didn’t feel anything. It was especially hard to pretend when Nazir was so damn honest. He allowed me a second to overthink––or try to put the pieces together––because he wanted me to know how he felt. His honesty had always been a turn-on for me. I hated myself for craving his honesty like oxygen.

Shaking off the feelings that kept creeping up my spine like a chill, I picked up my drink again and took a sip.

“You don’t get to sit here and say that.”

He leaned forward, his forearm muscles flexing against the edge of the table. “Why not?”

“It’s been years, Nazir. We’re not those people anymore or in that place. We’ve both moved on.”

As much as I was turned on by his honesty, it had me taken aback. Although what I had said was true, I didn’t expect him to agree.

“You’re right. We’re not. But everything I have felt for you, Tata…that shit didn’t just die because my stupid ass decided to leave.”

I slowly looked up into his eyes, too nervous to use my drink as a distraction. It was like I was seeing him for the first time––really looking into his eyes and seeing past my own hurt that I felt every time he stared at me.

The same man who loved me before he knew how to extend that same love to himself. The man who was trying to be everything that I needed him to be. A man who couldn’t let me down, so he decided it would be better for him to leave than see the pain he would cause.

My fork slipped from my hands, making a loud clattering sound through the quiet restaurant. The low music did little to hide the sound of my plate and fork clashing against each other.

He leaned back into the booth, eyeing me down with that same gaze that always made me feel like I was standing in front of him naked.

“Finish your food,” he finally said. “I’ll walk you back to the room.”