Page 56 of Rich and Rotten

“Girl, if you know like I know…run from that nigga!” I hollered, and Nazir came over and pulled me toward the hotel.

“Yo, you need to chill,” he said, with a hint of amusement in his tone.

His body was pressed against mine as he guided me through the revolving doors, making sure we remained close as it turned to bring us inside the hotel.

“What are you doing? Why are you stopping me? I need to warn her of the mistakes that will haunt her years later when she’s staring into her little girl’s eyes, knowing she lied to her.”

“You think it was easy for me?” He spun me around when we stepped out of the revolving doors. “Tatiana, you are crazy if you don’t think I didn’t die every fucking day after I left you––that I didn’t spend every waking moment thinking about you.”

The laugh that escaped me was unrecognizable. It was laced with bitterness and came out quicker than I intended.

“Nazir, I think you moved on just fine. I think you slept well at night, while I was stuck trying to put together the pieces of my heart you shattered. It’s funny how you’re in my face, but you have a girlfriend and a daughter. Worry about them.”

He looked past me.

The accusation that he slept well and went on with life perfectly had hit him. Not because it was true, but because I had no idea how much he struggled. His body tensed, and his eyes shifted further away from mine.

His voice lowered as he finally looked down at me. “You don’t know shit about what I’ve been through. You have no idea how many times I wanted to come back and fix things. How many nights I couldn’t sleep because I was worried about you.”

He swiped his hands over his face, as if trying to wipe away everything we had just said.

“Well, you stayed away, so you weren’t that worried,” I shot back.

“Staying away was what was best for you. It was the least I could give you when I had nothing to give.”

“Fuck that and fuck you! You left because of your fragile ego. You left because you couldn’t handle a woman having more money than you. You never let me help you, always would have rather strugg—”

“A real nigga ain’t gonna pull his woman down with him. Why the fuck would I take you from a life where I knew you would be taken care of and safe to make you struggle? Staying would have meant introducing you to struggle––a life that was beneath you. I wouldn’t have been a real man if I willingly led you into that life.”

“So, now because you have money, you think you can come get me back? Bullshit. I am not even that kind of woman.”

“I don’t expect you to fall into my arms and everything will be fine. Tata, I know I fucked up, and I own that shit. You have every right to hold that pain and hate for me. I fucked this up… fucked you up.”

“I’m not that same girl you left in that bed, Nazir. I will never be that girl again.” My voice cracked as I stared into his eyes.

Ugh. I was so damn angry with him. We were both strangers, not really knowing each other. Why did he have to leave me? I didn’t want him to be a stranger. I wanted him to be who I had always known him to be.

Nazir.

His hands found mine and held them. My heart did somersaults in my chest as I looked up at him. Tears threatened to spill down my cheeks, ready to ruin my makeup.

“I don’t want her,” he said, his voice rugged and rough. “I want you. Exactly as you are–– however broken you believe yourself to be. But I’m not leaving again. I’m going to fix you. I broke it, so it’s up to me to make it right by loving it back together.”

He rubbed my chest, and my heart melted.

My body grew warmer as I kept staring up at him, speechless. In that moment, I could feel the earth slowly spinning on its axis. Why did he have to say the right things? I hated how I wanted to believe every word he said to me.

Without saying another word, I spun around and headed deeper into the hotel toward the elevators. I didn’t need to look back to know that he was right behind me. The touch of our hands and the intense stare told me that he felt the same way.

We both felt everything.

Chapter Fifteen

Nazir

When we finally made it upstairs, her stubborn ass fumbled with the keycard, hands shaking, instead of letting me help. Standing behind her, watching her fight with the door and keycard was triggering for me. It was triggering because, in a sense, I had left her alone to fight. All those years, she had to push her feelings aside and fight without me there. She had to become a new mother while mourning a love she never thought she would have to mourn.

After she cursed under her breath the second time, I gently moved her out of the way and used mine. I stepped back, and she staggered toward the door. I gently grabbed her wrist to steady her. It was gentle enough that she could have slipped her wrist out of my hold if she wanted to.