Page 95 of Love’s Silver Bullet

Something Jake desperately wanted but now had to sacrifice for the greater good.

Sacrifice? He smothered a grunt as he reached to twine her hand in his, resting them on the bale between them. As if being near Sheridan, loving Sheridan, could ever be a sacrifice. No, the true sacrifice would come at Christmas, when he would have to tell her the truth, dashing any hope he might stir tonight, along with their precious friendship.

“I’m going to miss you, too, Sher,” he said quietly, the sweet smell of hay mingling with her light lavender scent to embed a beautiful memory in his mind.

Forever.

Voices soft and low, they chatted easily about everything, just like in their letters—books recently read, national politics, school, the ranch—and Jake wished more than anything they could always be this way. His chest rose and fell in a melancholy mood. But things would have to change—first tonight—and then again come Christmas.

All at once, he realized that if he was being forced to do this against his will, then by heaven’s gate, he wanted to enjoy every single moment. If Blaze and Dash had strong-armed him into tethering Sher’s heart to his in order to bring her back home, he made up his mind right then and there to make the most of it. His jaw stiffened along with his resolve. By channeling all of his love into the effort, no matter the loss to come later.

Because just once in his sorry life, he wanted to experience her love freely.

Without regret.

Without guilt.

And without restraint stopping him from letting her know just how much he adored her.

“Sher, I want you to know that our friendship is one of the most precious things to me in this world, and I have enjoyed every single moment we’ve had this summer”—he gave her hand a gentle squeeze as he captured her gaze with his own—“except one.”

She blinked, her peaceful smile dimming as her brows sloped up in concern. “What’s that, Jake?”

He softly skimmed the palm of her hand with his thumb. “Remember when I asked if you thought you could ever fall in love with Gray?”

She nodded, throat shifting as she stared at his hand over hers, her breathing suddenly shallow.

His finger slowly grazed the length of hers. “You said you didn’t know, and I have to admit, Sher, that bothered me a lot.”

Her gaze rose to meet his, as skittish as that sweet, little doe he found trapped in barbwire out on the south forty just last week. “Why?” she whispered with a hard duck of her throat, “if we’re just friends?”

His heart melted at the little-girl look in her eyes, the same one he fell in love with when she was just a mite with dirt on her face. He absently traced up and down the shape of her fingers, and his pulse ricocheted when a shiver traveled her body. “Because we’re not just friends,” he whispered, “are we, Sher?”

He heard the catch of her breath. “W-What are y-you saying, J-Jake?” she whispered, her voice as hoarse as his when he turned to face her, taking both of her hands in his.

“What I’m saying is”—his heart swelled with the truth of his feelings, and slowly tugging her to him, he held her close, eyes squeezed tight while he lay his head against hers, breathing in the lavender scent of her hair—“that I ache inside at the thought of you loving anyone else.”

She pulled back to search his eyes, cupping his jaw in her tiny hand. “But what does that mean, Jake?”

Heart pounding, he cradled her face, thumbs grazing her cheeks as he studied every beautiful feature. “It means that for once in my life, Sheridan Marie, I want to be able to tell you—and show you—exactly how I feel without fear of what it may mean down the road.”

He swallowed hard as he traced the shape of her lips with his thumb. “Gently, reverently, like my feelings for you. So will you let me, Sheridan? Will you let me show you what’s buried deep in my heart? What I would act on in a heartbeat if I wasn’t a broken man?”

All air seized in his throat for several painful seconds when water welled in her eyes, and then before he could draw in his next breath, she flung herself into his arms. Clinging to his neck, she lunged to kiss him, the taste of her lips completely ruining him for the slow and gentle kiss he’d meant to give when it unleashed a groan from deep in his soul.

“God help me, Sheridan, I love you,” he whispered, joy pumping through him as he buried his lips in the crook of her neck, feasting on the silk of her skin, the soft lobe of her ear, fingers lost and tangled in flaxen waves, as if he couldn’t get enough.

And God help him, he couldn’t because Blaze and Dash had opened the floodgates to a love long denied, and with everything in him, Jake wanted this woman to know that she possessed him body and soul and always would.

No matter their fate.

“Oh, Jake, I love you too,” she rasped, her breathing as fevered as his as she clung with all of her might.

He eased back to gently palm her hair away from her face, pulse ricocheting at how right this all seemed in the moment. As if he’d waited for her all of his life, and she him. Wonder purled through him while he slowly nuzzled her mouth, caressing her skin, her throat with a tenderness that belonged only to her.

Her tiny mew of pleasure completely undid him, seducing him with the need to explore more deeply, and forgetting all else, he did, the taste of Sheridan and peppermint sweet to his senses. Chest heaving, he cradled her face in his hands, both fire and fear licking through him when he realized he would do anything for this woman.

Including living without her.