Page 66 of Awakened Light

“Thorne. I do love you. I do,” I started and saw the hope flicker in his teary eyes. “But I can’t stay.”

The light in his eyes disappeared behind a cloud of sadness.

“I can’t. I’m so sorry. I can’t.”

It was impossible to look at him and still tell him no. The tears poured down my face as I jumped up and raced off down the beach. I didn’t even know where I was going, but all I knew was that I needed to get away from Thorne before that look in his eyes killed me... or coaxed me into throwing away my destiny and my duty to my people. I tore down the beach, leaving a trail of sand flying behind me, hoping that he wouldn’t come after me and steal away the last of my senses.

Or hoping he would.

But when I finally stopped running and turned around... he wasn’t there.

I collapsed into the sand and pressed my head to my knees and sobbed away all the anger and despair I had, knowing that the life that awaited me was one where I’d never see him again.

CHAPTER FIFTEEN

Thorne

I PACED ALONG THE LENGTH of our six-bedroom villa while I watched the sun come up over the horizon. Catrain had run off hours ago, and now that she hadn’t returned, I regretted not going after her. What if something had happened to her, and I’d let my self-pity and anger push her right into harm’s way?

At first, I’d thought she needed space, and so did I, but now that the hours had ticked by, fear replaced the rage that had consumed me at the thought of losing her. Unable to stand the wait any longer, I decided to try to hunt her down. For once in my life, I wished I had a werewolf with me that could follow her scent like the dogs they were. Or a Pict witch to locate her with a spell. But the Pict witch I needed was the very one missing. Instead, I just needed to use my heightened senses to listen for her as I raced around the island.

I opened the door to bolt out but stopped when I saw her staring back at me, her eyes red and swollen from the tears she must have shed all night.

“Christ. You’re safe. I thought something happened to you.”

I yanked her into my arms and held her against my chest. When she returned the embrace, I let out a sigh. “I’m so sorry I did that. We had a deal. I went back on it. Please forgive me, Catrain.”

“There’s nothing to forgive. I knew that we wouldn’t be able to part easily, and I came with you anyway and set us both up for torture. I shouldn’t have come, but I needed to be with you. It was selfish of me, and I made this so much harder for us both.”

Pressing my chin on the top of her head, I shook my head. “No. You were right to come. I’m glad I got to spend this time with you and that you got to see the world. Does it hurt like hell I’m gonna have to say goodbye? Yeah. More than standing under the noon sun without my ring. And it’s going to feel like being burned to death for years to come, but it was worth it to have you just for a little while. I promise you it was.”

“I’m really going to miss you, Thorne. I hope you know that. I hope you know that if I had a choice, it would be you. It would always be you.”

When she looked up, I saw the lazy tear slide down her flushed cheek. I wiped it away with my thumb and leaned down to kiss her soft lips.

“No more tears. We have a few hours left before we have to head to the airport. What do you say we hit the surf one last time?”

With a sniffle, she smiled. “I would like that.”

Even though it felt like my heart and soul were being ripped from my body and shredded into a million pieces, I pushed through the pain and slapped a smile on my face.

“Come on, baby. I’ll race you.”

With a flash, I whisked out the glass patio doors overlooking the ocean. Catrain hadn’t even taken a step before I stood grinning on the beach, holding two surfboards I’d snagged from the villa’s shed.

“Cheater.” She laughed. “I need to put my suit on. I’ll be out in a second.”

“Slowpoke,” I teased.

The rays from the rising sun sparkled across the ocean like millions of little diamonds. It was something I wouldn’t have noticed when I was a human, but now that I’d been centuries without seeing the beauty of it, it was something I’d never stop appreciating. I glanced down at the ring and saw the blue had faded even more, signaling the end of my days in the sun.

At least for now.

In a few months, when Catrain took power, we’d all be able to walk in the sun again. Watching sunrises with my family would almost certainly become a new tradition. The thought of sitting on the cliffs near our home watching it come up with each of them soothed the pain of knowing that Catrain wouldn’t be there to watch it with me.

A little.

But even with the slight balm, the pain remained almost unbearable.