Page 34 of Born to be Wilder

“Fine, we’ll go to church.” Marge held out her empty plate of pancakes. “But only if I get seconds. I’m gonna need my strength.”

My joy erupted through my grin. “Really? You’ll do it?”

Alice held her coffee cup with both hands, taking a long sip, followed by a sigh. “Fine. We’ll do it, Captain.”

I squealed with excitement, hurrying over to flip more pancakes onto Marge’s plate and fill up Alice’s coffee.

After we’d all dressed and gotten ready, we hit the road, Bertha bumping us down the freeway to my wish in Williamstown. The drive was short, but the anticipation in my chest was enormous. After we parked, we strolled through the parking lot, Marge looking around, unimpressed.

“I don’t see any boat, Doris. Is it a model museum? Is it in a shoebox?”

“We have to take a shuttle bus,” I explained. “That’s what it said on the Ark Encounter website.”

We found the crowd of families and church groups waiting at the tour bus stop and gathered in behind them. Then a short bus ride later, with Alice grumbling the whole time about the indignity of public transportation, we rounded the final bend, and the Ark came into view.

My jaw dropped as I stared at the marvel, and even Marge went slack-jawed. It was gargantuan—a wooden titan rising out of the greenery, looking like it had just settled after the flood.

“Oh my God,” Marge breathed. “Holy crap, that thing is massive.”

“Language, Marge,” I whispered, glancing at the people around us, hoping they hadn’t heard, though admittedly, I was thrilled by her awe.

We hopped off the bus, and Marge immediately scurried over to a large map.

Her eyes bugged out, and she turned to face me, wagging her finger while she grinned. “Doris! You sneak! You made us think this was some boring church lecture, but look! There’s ziplining! And a petting zoo!”

“What?” Sylvie squished in beside her. “Oh my gosh! There is fun stuff! This looks so cool!”

Alice pushed up next to them, a snort passing through her nose as she pointed at a picture of a kangaroo in the zoo section. “Oh, look, Marge. A kangaroo. Are you going to finish this stretch of the journey with another black eye?”

“Hey! It was a misunderstanding!” Marge barked. “Me and that kangaroo… we had a connection.”

“A connection of its fist and your eye.” Alice smirked.

“Just stay away from the kangaroo, Marge. Please.” Sylvie patted her on the back. “We promised Roxie we’d bring you back in better shape this time.” Then she pointed to another area on the map. “Look! They have camel rides. I’ve always wanted to see what the view is like from up there.”

“I’m not getting on a smelly camel, but the sun is out,” Alice mused, adjusting her sunglasses. “I wouldn’t mind sitting in the sun while I watch you ladies ride. Or, if this goes how I expect, you all will do something stupid to offend the camel, get run away with, and end up in the ER in a body cast you’ll need to wear the rest of the journey.”

Marge looked at her, then at Sylvie. “Why are you staring at me when you say that? Sylvie’s the one who wants to ride the camel.”

Alice lowered her sunglasses, answering Marge with nothing but one arched eyebrow.

Marge shrugged. “Okay, fine. I wanna ride the camel too. But it’s not going to go badly.”

“Mmmhmm.” Alice slipped her sunglasses back into place.

Marge checked her watch. “Okay, we have about three hours if we want to make our miles today. Let’s hit the ziplines first, then the camels. Then I’m going to go find the zoo and see if this kangaroo and I can be better pals than the last one.”

My heart sank. The tour of the Ark—the actual point of the trip—took at least two hours. If they did the “fun stuff,” they’d miss the tour. They’d miss the chance to experience the glory of the plan.

My secret plan.

“Wait,” I said, my voice small but firm.

They all turned to look at me.

“Um, the tour of the Ark takes at least two hours. Three if we’re being thorough, so I don’t know if we’ll have time for all the…” I stopped myself before I said “fun stuff,” because touring the Ark would be fun. Well, at least, it would be for me, and I hoped for them too. “I’m the captain. And I picked the tour. We’re going inside the ark first. If we have time, we can do some other stuff.”

“Doris, come on,” Marge groaned. “It’s a beautiful day! Why go wander around inside a giant wooden box when we can be out here in the fresh air? We’ve been cooped up all winter and now cooped up in the RV.”