Page 31 of No Bones About It

Thirteen

Halloween is the most magical day of the year. I don’t care if it’s blazing hot, freezing cold, or there’s a torrential downpour. No matter the weather, it is my favorite. But today? Today is particularly fabulous. The air is crisp but not too cold for costumes. The azure blue sky is painted with fluffy clouds, perfect for finding shapes in. And to top it all off, it's a full moon, so tonight will be a gorgeous night to celebrate BJ’s first Halloween.

All of my decorations are in place, and the treat bags are sorted for quick distribution. Good thing we got them assembled early, because we spent all night in each other’s arms. We jumped each other’s bones over and over again, until I was a shaking mess and so filled with pumpkin spice cum I felt like a cream pie.

Even still, it was all I could do to hold back after I got him ready this morning. He looked more handsome than ever in the enormous pinstriped black suit, bat bowtie, and Jack mask.

I feel a little bad sneaking out tonight without telling my new friends, the Spooky Bitches, but I know BJ and I need a more secluded home where it can be just the two of us. No prying eyes, no chance of someone finding out about my Halloween miracle.

He has to be my priority. Not only from a sense of responsibility and to do what is best for him, but no bones about it, I am in love with a twelve-foot sentient skeleton. And he loves me, too.

Right before the street lights turn on, I take my seat, keeping the bags for my little trick or treaters close at hand. They usually come through first and then towards the end of the night I’ll swap their bucket for the big kids who like to come later.

I even have bags for the teenagers with a pillowcase and maybe a costume or not, but who still deserve to get in on the Halloween action. I’ve never understood people who make fun of them or won’t give them candy. It’s the very opposite of the spirit of Halloween.

Stars wink into existence in the creeping twilight, and I smile up at them. This is the perfect Halloween night to end the most amazing month of my life.

I turn my head to talk to BJ, but frown when I realize I’m sitting in the driveway and he’s posed for the night way over in the yard. It’s not just the fence separating us, but a whole world. What used to be my favorite thing dims in comparison to the joy I feel when I am with him.

I don’t want him over there, looking out at the world and pretending not to be a part of it. I want him here next to me, handing out the bags and pointing out the best costumes. Sneaking each other candy and kisses, holding hands, and then turning out the porch light when all the goodies are gone.

My smile fades as I realize that’s something we will never have.

“Trick or treat,” cries a group of kids in bright costumes, interrupting my thoughts.

As I pass the loot over I realize, no, BJ and I will never have what others would consider to be a normal relationship. But it will still be better than what most of the world has, and that’s okay, too. If kids can be witches and goblins, then surely I can be in love with a skeleton.

He may not be able to come sit over here next to me, but there’s nothing stopping me from going to sit next to him. After all, Jack and Sally should be next to each other. Before the next group of kids can come through, I open the side gate and quickly rearrange some decorations to lead the way and place my camp chair right next to him.

I let myself smile again and enjoy the night, reaching over to caress his leg bones and stealing glances up at him all night long. And although his head doesn’t move I feel his LED eyes searching me out when no one is looking.

After a constant parade of kids and parents, the bags are almost gone. A group of older teenagers walk up, and I get out the last of my stash.

“Trick or treat,” they say, and despite their older voices, I can see the excitement that never seems to fade with age shining through.

I hand them the last of the bags, and they can’t hold back the smiles when they see all the treats. They thank me multiple times as I walk them to the gate, ready to close up after another fantastic Halloween night and then ride off into the sunset with BJ in the truck bed.

Just as the teens get to the sidewalk, the sound of squealing tires splits the peaceful Autumn evening.

I spin to see what the racket is and my brain struggles to comprehend what my eyes are seeing. A car has pulled perpendicular to the road, headlights shining on my ‘zero days’ to Halloween sign.

“What the—” I start as I automatically walk towards the car, trying to figure out what is going on.

“Lois?” I call out, recognizing her white Lexus.

I’ve watched almost every horror movie there is. I’ve done all the haunted hayrides and spooky attractions. Been chased by zombies and ghouls and all kinds of scary creatures, scream-laughing the whole way.

But that’s all pretend. Nothing could have prepared me for the real-life fear flooding my veins like a torrent of ice water. Each rev of the engine is another bucket of freezing water thrown over me.

Lois doesn’t turn to look at me, even as I scream her name. Her eyes are wide, fixed straight ahead on her grim goal. When she tightens her grip on the steering wheel, I realize exactly what she is planning.

My feet fly into action, propelling me back through the gate and towards my skeleton boyfriend. The red yarn Sally wig goes flying off my head, but I barely even notice. There is only one thought in my mind right now, echoed with each beat of my heart—save BJ, save BJ, save BJ.

Since the tent was picked up earlier today, the only thing standing between BJ and Lois’s white rage of steel on wheels is my rickety old fence. He doesn’t stand a chance.

“Run, BJ. You have to run,” I scream as my feet pound the earth, my legs burning with the effort of reaching him while my feet slip over the grass in the heeled black costume boots.

The squeal of tires burning rubber on the pavement cuts through the air just as I reach him.