Page 45 of Love Language

Otherwise, he made the rounds, talking lightly about his work, introducing Marco when it was appropriate, and steering far away from any conversations about Richard when they came up.

Since he was visibly with Marco, it mostly didn’t, for which he was extremely grateful. He didn’t know or care what they thought about seeing him with a new man, and he was just glad not to have to talk about his loss.

After they cut the cake, Greg’s brother projected a slideshow of pictures from their childhood. Marco sat next to him, and they laughed together as family members stood up to tell stories to accompany the photos.

Greg took a moment to reflect that his parents had been together for sixty years. It was mind-boggling. He tried not to think about how he and Richard had been on that trajectory. The echoes of the morning’s dream still shook him, but he wanted to be present for his family.

He looked at his parents, thinking about time, and realized that, somehow, they had gotten old. They were in their eighties, and while they were alert and engaged, they didn’t move as easily as they had the last time he visited a few years ago.

Even comparing them to the photos from their fifty-fifth wedding anniversary five years ago, they looked older. More tired.

Not tired of life, just plain physically exhausted.

Greg’s father had always fallen asleep in front of the TV, but Greg realized that he had dozed off multiple times yesterday afternoon. His mother had slipped away to take a nap yesterday, and she looked like she was about due for one now.

His sister and older brother who still lived in town probably knew all about it, but he realized it hadn’t occurred to him to ask. He’d need to check in with them, see if they needed any help.

He couldn’t move down, but he could easily visit every month or two and support them financially if they needed it.

Maybe Marco would drive down with him again. No, that wasn’t reasonable. As much as Marco seemed to get along with his family, he couldn’t monopolize his friend’s time that way. He stuffed the thought away.

After the party was over, Greg and Marco hung around with the rest of the family to clean up while his parents napped.

The kids were all piled up in front of the TV, and the adults were wandering around with trash bags and half-eaten trays of food that couldn’t possibly all fit in the refrigerator. There was a washing-and-drying team going in the kitchen and it sounded like someone had started to vacuum somewhere.

Greg combined two vegetable trays onto one and decided to just save everyone a few steps and set it down in front of the kids. Maybe if it was there, they’d eat something healthy, and he wouldn’t have to put it away.

He almost walked into the living room when he saw his older brother sign Marco’s name to his sister. He knew he shouldn’t eavesdrop, but if they were talking about Marco, he wanted to know about it.

I agree, his sister said, though he didn’t know to what.

Greg’s so much happier.

I’m glad he’s found someone. Well, not quite, but she didn’t need to know that.

No, I mean, he’s happier with Greg than he was with Richard.

Could that be true? Certainly not. He loved Richard. Richard was his whole world.

Though he could see how his family would think that. Richard didn’t know any sign, so he felt left out of family gatherings. And Richard was a bit growly and stern in a way that Greg found sexy, but probably didn’t make sense to anyone else. In return, since he couldn’t be bratty around his family, he probably ended up looking more withdrawn.

He remembered, during past family visits, being torn between staying close to Richard to interpret and keep him entertained, and just being with his family. It wasn’t a comfortable place to be, so it made sense that his family thought he looked a bit strained around him.

So that probably explained it all. Didn’t it?

His mind was spinning, and he ended up stumbling into the room before his siblings could continue their conversation.

Their eyes turned to him, and he awkwardly held up the tray he was carrying. Veggies for the kids.

Smart, commented his brother.

He left the room quickly.

For the rest of the day, he knew he was a little bit spacy, but he was still mulling things over.

His siblings’ suggestion made him feel disloyal to Richard. They shouldn’t think that anyone could make him happier than Richard, even if it wasn’t true.

Worse, though, was the possibility that it might be true.