Page 84 of A Little Bit Naughty

“Oh, sweetheart.” Remi’s voice was rough, like he was feeling just as tormented as Isaac had felt when he heard those words. “You are the most gorgeous, sexy, strong man I’ve ever met, and I hope you know that.”

Isaac swallowed. “I try to. And, um, when the T started working, the testosterone, that is, I finally started bulking up and my voice dropped. I should have just been feeling great about myself. Owen was really trying. I mean, we both were. And we loved each other so much. But he told me that I was too masculine for him because he was straight and we… we broke up. We wanted to keep loving each other–” He sucked in a gulping breath. “–but he couldn’t make himself want me when I was me.”

Remi looked like he was in physical pain, but his voice came out strong, with that honeyed note of command. “Sweet, sweet boy. I want you to curl up tight in that blanket. Lay down and wrap it around you so tightly you can’t even move. That’s right. Hold the corner in one hand and roll over.”

Isaac followed instructions, not even worrying about why he was doing it or how weird it might look. Daddy was telling him to wrap up in the blanket and… oh, that did feel better. Like he was wrapped up in a little cocoon, safe from the world.

“Good boy,” Daddy told him. “The very best boy. I want you to imagine me not just holding you, but on top of you. So heavy that you can hardly breathe.”

It wasn’t hard to imagine. Isaac’s arms were already trapped around his stuffies, and he could practically feel Daddy’s heavy weight. That image was like the only thing tethering him down.

He wasn’t sure how long he stayed like that. Daddy never complained or moved though. He just kept murmuring soothing phrases about how perfect Isaac was. How handsome and strong, all interwoven with the words boy and man. It wasn’t something Isaac thought he needed to hear so badly, but he really did.

Finally, Isaac started to realize that he was feeling hot and itchy. He tried to squirm his way out of the blanket, but he actually had to roll over to get free. It was funny enough that he let out a little laugh.

“Feeling better, baby?”

“Yeah.” He made his lips pull up into a smile. “You can see why I said that Da– Owen was a good guy, right? Like, I know it’s not his fault and it’s not mine. He really tried to support me, and he still checks up on me. We just weren’t the right genders for each other.”

“Yes, but losing your Daddy to be yourself still must have been painful. For both of you.”

“It was. I know he feels horribly guilty.”

“I can only imagine.” Remi pinned Isaac with his eyes. “You know I’m attracted to you because you’re a man, right? An adorable little boy, and a sexy, competent man. Right?”

Remi hadn’t mentioned their mutual attraction since Isaac returned to Boston, but he could feel down to his bones that it was true. Not just that Daddy saw him as male, but that he wanted Isaac exactly as he was. It felt like this was building toward something real.

Or maybe it already was real.

There was only one more thing that he felt like he needed to talk about with Remi, but he didn’t have the energy for it tonight. He was already feeling raw enough.

“I know,” he finally answered.

“Good,” Remi said fervently. “I still wish I could fly out there right now.”

“Me, too.” It was the first time either of them had admitted to it, though it had to be on Remi’s mind as much as it was on Isaac’s. He wanted to say Me too, Daddy. But saying it on a vacation fling was different from saying it for real. Even if it was bursting from his lips like a balloon ready to explode.

Something flitted across Remi’s face, something happy and secretive that he covered up quickly. That was all it took to make it click. “Hang on, is that why you and Tommy have been acting so weird? Are you coming out here?”

Remi’s eyes widened and then he broke into a grin. “Is that alright? I wanted it to be a surprise, and I’m going to tell Brick that Tommy deserves a punishment if he let you know. But I was going to tell you next week anyway.”

Isaac laughed, the last of the remembered sorrow rolling away like the clouds at the end of a storm. For all of his hurt, Owen had truly been a long time ago and he was starting to heal. Now he was just excited. “When? When are you coming to visit me? Next week?”

“No, in two weeks.”

Isaac mentally calculated. This week was Rosh Hashanah, so next week was Yom Kippur, which meant… “My birthday! You’re coming for my birthday! And Sukkot!”

“That’s right. I know you still have to work, but if you can save a little time for me…”

“Oh, I will! I’ll save all of it.” Isaac felt giddy now, wrapped up in joy. “As long as you’ll visit a sukkah with me. At least once for my birthday.”

Remi grinned. “I’m sure we could arrange that.”

This was going to be the best birthday ever.

19

Remi