Page 17 of Redemption Island

“You think that’s funny, huh?” I reached out to playfully dunk her and then decided against it. My fingers brushed through her hair, cupping the locks behind her ear. Her laughter faltered, and her eyes widened. Our faces were less than a few inches from one another. Our knees brushed under the water.

“Tell me more about Lillian. Or your family? You mentioned you had no one. What happened?” Her eyes saddened before she spoke.

“My parents died when I was in eighth grade. I spent my high school years living with my uncle. It wasn’t easy, and I worked hard to go to college.”

“What wasn’t easy, living with him or working hard?”

“Both.” Her eyes lowered, and my fingertips came to her chin. I could see she didn’t trust me with more information.

“Why were you at The Front Door?” This question confirmed any doubt I had of her trust. Her lips clamped and the motion physically told me she would not speak. I let the question slide and tried to offer my own history.

“I think things came too easily for me. I had anything I could ever want, which left me without knowing what I needed.” Her eyes squinted at me. “Sometimes it isn’t easy being at the top, either.”

She scoffed.

“I’m serious. Nothing I did was good enough for my father. Under his pressure, I rebelled. Whatever I could do, I did. And I got away with most of it. He didn’t stop me. He never stopped me.” I shook my head and looked off in the distance.

“And what you wanted was someone to stop you?”

I shrugged my shoulder. I didn’t know what I wanted. “In some ways, I thrived on the attention I received because I didn’t receive it otherwise. School was too easy. Athletics like a second nature. When I obtained my first merger, I crushed it into pieces because of the owner’s weakness.” I smacked the water.

“Sounds like it was easy.”

“But don’t you see, all I did was take, because it was easy. No one fought me. Nothing was…difficult.”

“Until now,” she said, her voice lowered. I nodded.

“I wanted someone to give me permission, instead of always feeling like I could take whatever I wanted.”

My eyes shifted downward, and I could see the sharp tips of her nipples beneath the water line. Her hands had disappeared. We seemed to be circling each other as we spoke.

“Sometimes, I think I’m dreaming you.” My voice was low, as I stroked the hair over her ear again, focusing my eyes on the motion. I couldn’t look her in the eyes as I spoke such things. Vulnerable to that violet glare, I was afraid she wouldn’t believe me.

“I don’t want you to be a dream,” I muttered, a rugged timbre coming from my throat. We were even closer to one another, and her knees somehow came between mine. I no longer felt the cold liquid surrounding me, but warm heat radiating off her as I touched her. My knuckles skimmed down the side of her neck and lingered to her shoulder. A ripple of water caught the attention of my dick. I was hardening, despite the cold. I continued to gently rub a path from her shoulder, up her neck to her ear and back.

“Are you touching yourself?”

She gasped, shaking her head, but her face shaded a slight pink, and my lips twitched. My knuckles retreated below the water line, drawing close to the exposed swell of her breasts. Her chest rose and fell, but she hadn’t uttered a sound. Her eyes remained on mine. I opened my hand to let my fingers tickle her skin. I could feel her heart race, and I took the risk to lower my fingertips and grace the slope of one breast. I stopped at the nipple and circled the tip. Her breath caught.

“Do you like that?” I asked, and she pulled back from my touch. Her brow pinched, as she pushed further away.

“What? What did I say?” Her expression troubled me. I didn’t understand. “Tell me.”

“That’s…that’s what he asked me…”

My hand reached for her arm, preventing her retreat. “I don’t want you to think of him when you’re with me.”

She gasped again. “Then you shouldn’t have been there with him. Your presence and his memory tangle together too often in my head.”

I sighed, exhaling deeply, releasing my hand from her arm and holding it up in surrender.

“I’m sorry. You’re right.” My voice lowered, and my eyes fell in shame. I shouldn’t have been there. I knew why I was, and I knew what I did, and neither thought made it easy to face her, especially when she blatantly reminded me.

“Help me,” I stressed as I reached for each of her shoulders, unable to deny myself from touching her. My thumbs caressed gently over her smooth, cool skin. “How can I make it better?” I begged. My eyes raced back and forth, uncertain where to focus but desperate with need for her assistance to make things right for her. She tugged back, settling into the water to release my touch. We stared at one another a moment, my eyes willing her to tell me something, anything.

“I just…I find there are triggers for me. Things that are said. Phrases. It brings back a memory.” My finger reached for her hair and scooped around her ear. I wanted to draw her close and hold her against me. I wanted her to forgive me.

“Is there a way to stop me before I say one?” I asked.