Page 22 of Return to the Island

“They refused to let me see you. I didn’t have an appointment. I wasn’t on an approved list. They had no idea who I was. And I realized…” I paused as my voice faltered. “I just accepted that it might be for the best. If I wanted to protect you, I shouldn’t make contact with you.”

“You had no right to make that decision without me,” he snapped.

“But I did,” I replied defiantly, but my tone soft. I could not take back the past. “I already felt guilty for leaving you behind. I was picked up, literally, and flung over Franco’s shoulder and taken to the boat. I never even made it back to the treehouse.” My lids closed briefly with fond memories of my home wrapped around a tree. It was the only home that felt like mine until I bought the building for The Mouse Trap, having office space on the first floor and my apartment on the second.

“Did he hurt you?” Tack gasped and I shook my head.

“Anyway, I continued with my plan not to include your name. I decided you weren’t real and the experience was a vision quest. I was relieved when Lillian didn’t use your name either, though, I suspect your lawyers had something to do with that. I changed my name so I could publish my work and not be connected directly with the trials that placed us on the island. I still had all my field notes, and I guess, at one point, I was just angry. I decided I earned the right for that degree. I wrote in a manner that I had dreamed you. Maybe it wasn’t reality after all, but a fantasy inside my head to restore my strength and give me power.” I swiped at a tear and cursed myself for letting them fall. “But I still have you to thank because in my head or not, it was real to me. So very real. And it changed everything. Being with you. Lov…” I stopped for a breath, breaking off on the thought of loving him. “Just being with you, it made all the difference in me.”

He pressed off the boat and stepped toward me, but I stepped back.

“You already told me you feel responsible for me, and I just wanted to assure you that I hold you in no obligation. I wanted you to know that while it was rough at first, I’m good now. Things are good and you don’t need to feel responsible. You don’t need to feel like you have to give me the million dollars. Miller and I discussed it, and if you heard everything between Miller and me, then you know how I feel. While we could use the money, I don’t want it this way.”

“This way?” he questioned. “At the expense of your heart, right? Mouse, listen to me. I’m not giving you money out of some self-serving pity. And to clarify, it has nothing to do with how I feel about you either. Your organization deserves the money. It’s well planned out and it’s sound. You have good intentions and you need the capital.” He swiped a hand through his hair and I had to ask.

“How you feel about me?” My voice broke as I repeated the words, harshness squeaking in. “At dinner, you practically ignored me, acting like you hadn’t devoured me fifteen minutes before. You stood with Abby all night and then you break into my room to sleep, only sleep, with me, and disappear in the morning.”

He smiled slowly, the curl to his lush lips growing, and I wanted to wipe the smirk off his face.

“Abby warned me it might look like you slept your way to the money.” A gasp escaped, and I stepped back with the thought, but Tack closed the distance. He reached for my arm and tugged me toward him. “I don’t want to harm your reputation, so I needed to be on my best behavior. I was distant at dinner, but let me tell you, it was damn near the hardest thing I’ve ever done because I had gone down on you fifteen minutes before, and I hadn’t had my fill. You were all I could think about. And then I had to prance around like you weren’t the most important person in the room to me, trying to play a game to keep it equal among all of you when all I wanted to do was drop to my knees again and take you across a table. And if you don’t want me in your room, kick me out. You’ve done it before.” I gasped again, but he continued on. “And fuck Abby. But it’s damn reassuring if you’re jealous of her because that means you don’t want anyone near me, like I don’t want anyone near you.”

With that declaration, his mouth crushed mine. His hand came to my jaw, but his mouth met mine first, and he devoured me. Hungry wasn’t enough to describe the way he took my lips, savoring them, drinking me in, before plunging his tongue between my lips, licking inside my mouth, striving for every drop of sweet flavor I could offer him. He didn’t stop, but continued to lap and lick, nip and suck. No corner of my mouth was left unturned, untouched, unsavored. His body pressed to mine, and we moved until I felt my back hit the side of his boat. He leaned into me and kissed me more, but kept his hands on my jaw. Eventually, his hunger staved and the kissing slowed, lingering with a final peck here and another nibble there before pulling back and looking into my eyes.

“I know a lot of time has passed. We need time to rebuild, Mouse. Give me that time.”

I couldn’t say no. I could hardly think. The way he kissed me. The way he held my jaw. He possessed me. I’d learned that on the island. He dominated me because my heart belonged to him.

“Okay,” I said weakly, and his smile brightened his face.

“Come with me today. Please. I want you to myself. I don’t care what they think. I want you alone with me. I have something planned.”

I smiled slowly in response to his excitement but more so because he was asking. He wanted me to say yes to him.

“I’ll go wherever you lead.”