Page 87 of Midlife Crisis

“Save it for the judge, mister,” he blurts, and I don’t even know what that means.

“What were you doing at the crisis center anyway?” I ask. Elston’s head twists to his younger brother as if this question hasn’t been asked.

“I was dropping off a friend.” His voice squeaks as his head lowers. My need to help crashes over me.

“What happened?” My concern is returned with a glare.

“None of your business.” It would have been my business had I stayed at the center. Instead, I traveled with Stephie to the hospital and waited until she was out of immediate danger. I couldn’t help her more than that. She needs a sponsor, but I can’t be it for her. I’m too close to her history with my past, but I offered recommendations of places to call and people to meet if she is ready to keep herself clean. Only Stephie can make those decisions, no one else.

Liam peeks around his second brother’s arm. “Why can’t we let him in again?”

“He cheated on Mom,” Elston snaps, and I feel like I’ve been sucker punched.

“Ronin,” I groan, swiping a hand down my face before I can look at Midge’s middle child. “That is not what happened. It’s a crisis center…and she was having a crisis.”

“Oh, I bet she was having a crisis,” Elston retorts, and I see his hand twitch. If he wasn’t a kid, only seventeen, he’d be on the floor in a second. Instead, I take a deep breath and clasp my itchy fists.

“You watch yourself, kid. And don’t disrespect women like that.”

“Because you respect them so much?” He’s back to sharp eyes and an even sharper tongue. Sarcasm isn’t pretty on a teenager, and I almost laugh at his balls. He reminds me of myself.

“I respect women plenty, especially your mother. I’d never cheat on her. And I’m not having this conversation with you until I speak to her first.”

Elston shakes his head, and it’s Ronin who speaks. “Well, she isn’t home. She said she had errands, but I think she just wanted to be alone. We don’t know when she’ll be back.”

“Why don’t we like him anymore?” Liam asks all innocent, his head whipping back and forth between his brothers like a tennis match.

“He wasn’t good to Mom,” Elston adds. “He treated her like Dad did.” I might hate this kid for the comparison to a man I know treated Midge poorly.

“Elston,” Ronin warns, his eyes shifting from his big brother to his little brother, issuing a warning.

“What did Dad do?” Liam asks all innocent, and I swipe a hand down my face again, before imploring Elston to shut up before he digs himself too deep. Liam looks up at me. “You can’t divorce her. You aren’t married.” He pauses a second. “Are you breaking up?”

The horror on his face nearly breaks me. I want to reach forward and pull him to my chest, but with the glare Elston levels at me, I don’t move.

“We are not breaking up. Absolutely not. We are just getting started.” I meet Elston head-on before I see the hesitation in his eyes. His brows pinch slightly before he looks away.

“Either way, she isn’t here,” Ronin reminds me.

“Like I said, I’ll wait.” I’ve been waiting so long for someone like their mother, what’s a few more minutes, hours, days? I spin for the stoop and take a seat, briefly glancing over my shoulder to smirk at a seventeen-year-old. Elston steps back, forcing Ronin farther into the house, but Liam curves around his brothers.

“I’ll wait with you.” He walks to the front stoop and takes a seat on the bricks next to me. This kid. I look down at the brick step, and a chuckle hits me. Literally, I’m pausing on another step in life. How is that for irony?

+ + +

I’m pretty certain waiting isn’t one of the twelve steps of recovery, and as the time ticks by, I grow more restless. Midge doesn’t really think I cheated on her, right? This is all a misunderstanding. I just need to tell her what happened.

A light touch comes to my wrist, and I flinch at the contact. I turn toward Liam, forgetting for a moment I had company. He’s been playing on his phone the whole time he sits next to me, but I’ve given up looking at mine. Midge isn’t answering any type of message.

“What are these for again?” Liam points at the two bands around my wrist, hesitating that I might reject his touch.

“You startled me when you touched me,” I reassure him. “My thoughts are kind of deep at the moment.”

“Mom gets like that too sometimes. Sort of in her head and she doesn’t hear us call her name or enter a room. I thought it was just a girl thing.”

I chuckle. “Yeah, what do you know about girls?” He’s only ten, but then again, when I was ten, I’d already felt up the thirteen-year-old babysitter. I don’t want to think of Liam doing those things yet. Stick to baseball, kid.

“Not much. I’m not all gooey for them like Elston and Ronin. Dad says my time will come. Mom says don’t rush it. I have girls who are friends, though. That’s cool.” He nods like this is an accomplishment.