Page 89 of Midlife Crisis

Midge’s brow squeezes so tight, her skin crinkles. I lean forward and kiss her there. “You’re my first, because I love you and you love me back. Not in a selfish way. Not because you need something from me. You’re just here, and I want to be here with you. I want more, too, little lady.”

Tears flow freely, her shoulders slumping forward.

“No more tears, though, baby.” Her body continues to lean, and I wrap my arms around her, dragging her up into my lap.

“I’m too heavy for you.” She sniffles, squirming on my thighs.

“You’re a weight I want to carry. And no, you are not too heavy for me.” I kiss her temple before pitching forward. Her arms wrap around my neck, and she lets out a little squeak as I stand, cradling her to my chest.

“Hank, what are you doing?”

I spin for the front door, taking the few steps toward it. “I’m carrying you over the threshold.” I press the door open with my shoulder, then kick the door shut and head for the stairs. She nestles into me as we climb to my room. Gently, I lay her on my bed and sit to unlace my boots. She watches me, unmoving as I tug them both off.

“Midge, let me make love to you, intimately.” The request is so direct, she blinks. She remains lying back, and I realize it might be too fast. I’ll hold her, just feel her heart beating with mine. Instead, she sits up and removes her light jacket. I shift to lie next to her, cupping her cheek with one hand.

“I love you,” I say, and then I kiss her. Every kiss has been a discovery. The first kiss. The slow kiss. The quick kiss. The lingering. The hot as fuck. But this kiss, it’s new once again as we take our time to work over one another, sucking, sipping, licking. I don’t know how long we’ve been at it, but eventually, it grows more urgent. Clothing gets removed between more kisses. My shirt is discarded, so her delicate fingers can trace over my abs. Fuck, I like when she touches me. Her sweater goes, so I can cover each breast, latching on until her nipples peak and a red mark blossoms. Jeans follow, and I stand to peer down at her. Her hair sprawls over my pillows, her limbs spread, ready for me. Removing my own jeans, I watch her watch me. The intensity in her eyes says everything. She wants me. She wants more from me. She’s a fantasy, and one I’ll never grow too old for.

I grip her ankles and slowly drag her toward me. I want to take my time, but I’m also so hard. My dick dances before me, stiff and eager to enter her. My palms climb her shins, wrap over her knees, and lift her by the back of her thighs. My knees bend, pinning me to the edge of the mattress. Holding her body like this, so open, so pliable, I can’t wait to connect with her. My dick springs forward, aching to make us one. I hold her where the curve of her ass meets her legs and drag her along the length of me. She’s slick and ready, and I want inside. I want more.

“I don’t want any more barriers between us.” I mean condoms, ex-lovers, miscommunication and anything else that keeps us separate. “I want to own every crevice, every crack of you, little lady. Fill you and seal you to me.” My voice scratches, rough and raspy as I slide through her tender folds. She’s coating me, and the sensation is unreal. I watch my ministrations and then look up to find her watching us.

“But I don’t want to just fill you, I want to fill you up, your heart, your soul. All of me for all of you.” Her eyes jump to mine as her clit pulses. She clenches her thighs, and I sense she’s getting close, waiting for me, but I want her to hear me—her love to hear mine.

“Do you get it? Do you understand me?” I’m practically growling, but I’m not fierce. I’m intense. I need her to know. “I love you.”

“I love you, too.” With that, I slip into her; I’m slow, purposeful, direct until my dick disappears completely. I love this connection, this feeling, this sensation. I’m bare in there, raw and exposed, because that’s how I feel with her. That’s how I want to be with only her.

As I drag back, her thighs fight me. She wants me to stay in her depths.

“We’ll get there, baby. I promise.” After a few slow thrusts, I can’t take the lessened pace. She’s frantic on the bed, and I love how she wants to race. Not rush for a finish line but sprint nonetheless. My speed increases, choppy at first until we find the dance, our bodies moving as one. With my hands under her knees, she opens so wide for me, drawing me into her heat.

“I love you like this.” I stammer, the force of me entering her shifts the bed. The headboard taps at the wall. The frame scratches on the wood floor. I don’t care. I want every sound to be from her, from us together. “But I love you…more.”

Finally, she gives me the sound I seek most—my name on her lips as she screams with pleasure.

+ + +

Hours later, we linger in bed. It was a rough start to a Sunday but pure pleasure to forget everything and spend the day between the sheets. Midge called her sons to say she’d be out all day. She told me she’d explain everything to them later. As she lay spent from round two, her thighs wrapped around my hips while my head rests on her chest, she strokes my hair. Her short, blunt fingernails cause me to shiver, but at the same time, I relish the touch.

“What do you think will happen to Stephie?” I perch up on my elbows, suddenly concerned Midge hasn’t gotten the message. I love her, only her.

“I hope she gets help, but she can’t be my problem. I don’t mean that coldly, but she’s too close to me in some ways, and she needs someone outside her past.”

Midge nods, her eyes drifting off to the left.

“Seeing her like that, it was an eye-opener for me.”

Her gaze returns to mine. “How?”

“All that I’d done. All that I could have been. The spiral went deep for me. It was another wake-up call. Looking back, I can see I didn’t really want that life.”

“Is it that easy to say?” She’s still brushing over my head, and my body feels so replete. I don’t want to talk about old things anymore, but I want her to have all the answers.

“Maybe. Hindsight is twenty-twenty and all that. I think one reason I corkscrewed so far down was because I just wanted someone to love me for me. I wanted to be somebody’s someone.” I lean forward and kiss her. When I pull back, I kiss over her heart, slow and steady just like things should be. Her hands cup my head, and she forces me up to look at her. Her bright brown eyes glint with gold.

“You are.” She pauses as her lips curl. “To me.”

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