Page 66 of Second Chance

The scene also reminded me of prom night. Chris was hammered by the time we arrived at the hotel. He wasn’t open about his plan, but the hints were there. We were both virgins. Prom night was the night, only it wasn’t. He fell to the bed while I went to use the bathroom and when I returned to the room he was passed out—mouth gaping, arm over his eyes, another hanging off the bed toward the floor. I called James to come pick me up. He was the only one who wouldn’t chastise me for where I really was as my parents thought I was at a friend’s for the night.

“It’s nothing,” I respond to Alyce, looking away from her and staring out at my girls who look like they’ve never played volleyball in their lives.

What the fleck are they doing?

“Okay, take five,” Alyce calls out, and I realize I’ve asked the question aloud. Crossing my arms, I pinch the bridge of my nose. “You,” Alyce snaps, and I look up to see who she is speaking to, only to discover it’s me. “Coaches’ office.”

I follow like an errant child, surprised at the strength in her tone and the directness of her demand. I pass her into the room, and she shuts the door.

“Sit. Speak.”

While I take my seat, I glare up at her. “Well, missy, this is a side to you I haven’t seen before.”

“I have many sides, sister,” she mocks in return. “Now, tell me what’s going on with you.”

We stare at one another in silence a moment. I’m the first to break away and lower my head to my hands.

“It’s a man, isn’t it?” Her voice rises an octave. “It’s the man from the other night, right?” Her voice has reached an excited screech, and a little clap resounds in the small office. She’s back to herself— cheery McCheerson cheerleader.

“It’s nothing,” I repeat, and I mean it. There’s nothing to say or explain or happening. Just nothing. The thought makes me sad and a little hollow, as I put myself out there and then wanted to scrub myself clean after he spoke to me like he did. After his comment about Chris, he promptly fell asleep. How can men do that? One minute they’re talking, and the next, out cold.

“It’s never nothing with a man. Always something. Always trouble.” Alyce shakes her head as she speaks, and I lift mine to look up at her.

“So much trouble,” I mutter. Whatever Chris did, whatever Denton did, it’s been a long time.

“Mati, you’ve got to give him a chance. You’re out of practice, but—”

“What do you mean, I’m out of practice?”

“I just mean, it’s been a long time since you’ve had to date, put effort into something.”

“Marriage was effort,” I defend, thinking of all the times Chris and I disagreed. We weren’t the Bickersons, but we had our spats and married couple issues—finances and things.

“I’m sure it was, but dating is a different kind of effort.”

“Who says anything about dating?”

Alyce’s brow rises. “Friends-with-benefits is even more complicated. Why do you think that’s a label on social media?”

I’m sitting upright, hands on my knees, blinking at her. “I’m not friends-with-benefitting either.” Does that even make sense?

Alyce giggles. “Okay, look, anything you do, related to any man, from this point forward, is going to be complex. You had a familiarity with Chris. He was your husband. For years,” she emphasizes as if I don’t know this fact. “You’ll be starting from scratch with anyone else. Starting new. The road might be bumpy at first, but the ride is worth the adventure.”

Alyce’s analogy hits harder than she knows. A road. A ride. An adventure. Life would have been all these things if I had been with Denton, but I never considered a life with Denton. Not really. Not until recently. Now, I think of him too much, but he isn’t who I remember, and although I accept that people change, I don’t want the rockstar. I want my friend.

“Maybe I just shouldn’t date.”

Alyce shakes her head again. “Maybe not dating has been your problem. You’re out of practice like I said.”

A subtle knock comes to the door, and we both look up at the window to see Hannah on the other side. Alyce opens the door.

“There’s a man here for Coach Rath. I told him we had closed practices, but he says he has an appointment.”

Alyce turns to me, a brow raised again. “What’s he look like?” she directs back to Hannah.

“Tall and divine.” Her face blushes. “I mean, he looks like a rockstar.”

Alyce nods at Hannah. “We’ll be right out. Tell the girls to run ladders.” Hannah groans but it’s just punishment for the laziness of practice.