Page 95 of Silver Brewer

When a door opens

[Letty]

“It’s Finn,” I quietly say, crestfallen he didn’t respond to my proposal. Instead, he looked like he wanted to laugh. Laugh me off the mountain perhaps. I’d deserve it. I took a chance, and this is what I get.

You broke up with him. That’s what you got.

“I’ll get him,” Giant offers and steps around me. He hasn’t taken the ring from my fingers, and I don’t know what to do next, so I slip it back into my pocket, feeling foolish and idealistic. He stops as I haven’t moved and watches the ring disappear in my pocket. His mouth opens and then shuts.

I deserve the hesitant treatment. My heart aches, and I blink back the sting in my eyes.

“Why did you rent such a big truck?” he asks, opening the back door and leaning in to unclip Finn from his car seat.

“I didn’t rent it. It’s mine.”

Giant stands upright, holding Finn to his shoulder. “It’s yours.” His eyes narrow. “Did you drive here? From Chicago?”

“I did.”

“That’s a long drive alone. With a baby.” He jiggles Finn at his shoulder, pressing a kiss to the side of his head. “Who is growing into a big boy?” He smiles at Finn and then turns back to me. “Why?”

“I wanted to get to you as soon as I could, and Finn needs so much stuff. It was too complicated to fly. And I just…” I wasn’t really thinking. As soon as I knew I could leave the state, I packed our bags and all Finn’s necessities. I put my place up for sale. Marcus is my realtor. I had to get to Giant. In person. I couldn’t call him or send a text. I needed to see his face if he rejected me.

In hindsight, I might have been hasty in more than one decision.

“Cricket, that wasn’t very safe,” he admonishes.

“Ten hours plus stops. He was such a good boy.” I reach up and rub down Finn’s back as he stares up at Giant. “Remember Giant, Finn?” I ask him as if he can answer me, but he turns his head, recognizing his name. Then he looks up at Giant and tugs his beard. Giant moves his little hand and sucks at his fingers. He’s so sweet to him.

I want to adopt Finn with you.

I guess he’s changed his mind. I feel sick. I drove all this way, nerves eating at me, and now…I’m just tired.

“What time did you leave?”

“Around three a.m.” It’s close to six in the evening now. He eyes me for a minute, still playing catch with Finn’s fingers as they reach for his beard. Giant’s mouth sucks them in.

“You hungry?”

Not really. “I could eat.” I slip my hands into my back pockets, which forces my breasts forward, and Giant’s eyes lower to the cleavage swelling out the top of my tank. It’s warmer here than in the Midwest, and I’m sticky from the drive and the heat.

“I’ll make us dinner,” he says, but there’s an awkwardness between us.

“I should probably go to Conrad Lodge and check in.” I drove all this way and suddenly feel like I need a minute away from him.

“Didn’t you hear what I said? You’re moving in with me.”

“But I…” I just asked you to marry me, and you didn’t answer. “I think maybe we should talk about a few things first.”

His expression holds firm. He’s given me a hint of a grin but nothing like the smiles he used to give me. No laughter, which I miss. I remember wondering what it would be like to hear him laugh. Would it rock my world? It did. In more ways than one.

He kissed me, searing and sweet but not enough. More like the marking of territory but not the possession of my heart. He doesn’t want me.

Then why is he insisting I move in?

“We can talk over dinner. You got any bags?”

“A whole trunk full of stuff.” Finn doesn’t travel lightly, and I didn’t know how long we’d be staying, if we stayed at all. I’m suddenly too exhausted to consider turning around and driving seven hundred miles back home. I don’t feel like Chicago should be our home. With Giant is where we need to be.