Page 72 of Silver Player

Sadie ran away.

Sadie’s friend—I choke on the word—stole money.

Sadie is meeting my family.

I leave out the list of infractions against Roxie. She isn’t worth my thoughts, which is a lie I repeat to myself over and over to steel my heart. I feel strange after what we did, but more so after what she said, dismissing it so casually. I didn’t lie when I told her that she was breaking me. I like her. I thought she liked me, finally. I feel connected to her in a way I’ve never felt connected to another woman. Rachel was different. She was my best friend, and we might be the poster couple for why friends shouldn’t marry, but it was more than that. And Roxie means more to me.

As I told her, what happened last night was not my reputation. Fine, I admit I’ve done the slam, bam, thank you, ma’am, and I’m always the one to leave long before daylight. I’ll always be the first to go, but last night, I lingered because I wanted to stay. I wanted to continue the cocoon we wrapped around one another, falling into each other like we did.

Damn, she comes quickly, but after the first one, it’s long and lazy and so fucking sweet. Then, when she came around me, I was the quick one. I can’t believe I left the condoms in my truck, but I never thought, not in a million years, that Roxie would hold onto me like that. Her hands. Her mouth. Her pussy. She clutched at me like she didn’t want me to leave her, and I didn’t want to go anywhere but right where we were with me buried inside her.

Then she had to open her damn mouth this morning and brush it all off like it was nothing. No big deal. Well, it was a big deal to me because, despite my reputation, I do have a heart and not just a dick. It hurt to lose Rachel, and it hurts to feel like I’m losing Roxie. All the women between weren’t close enough for this kind of feeling. First and last, that’s how I see these two women, only Roxie seems to disagree with me. No shocker there.

“You know,” Clyde begins, interrupting my rambling thoughts. “The second you tell kids they can’t do something, like date someone, that’s the person they want most.”

I stare at Clyde and his unsolicited fatherly wisdom.

“Clyde, when did you become an expert on being a dad?” My sarcastic tone makes my friend flinch.

“I’m not. I’m an expert on being a son, and as soon as my dad told me no, I wanted to do whatever it was twice as much. Didn’t you?” He tips a brow at me. Point taken.

“Shit,” I mutter. “I’m really messing this up.”

Clyde sighs and then chuckles. “They don’t come with a manual like bartending or business owning.” My hand scrubs down my face at his comment. “But you’re doing fine, Billy. I mean, you seem really invested. You go over there all the time. You’ve taken her places, and you were obviously concerned when she went missing.”

“What about this stealing issue? Roxie’s going to flip, and Hetty…I just feel guilty.” The flower shop is at the other end of the block. Her business does well, but any type of theft feels like an assault.

“You’ll figure something out,” Clyde assures me, but I stare at him, hopeful he’ll have a solution. “Okay,” he stresses, rubbing his hands on his jeans. He could use some new clothes as his zipper is popping open a bit. “How about giving her a job here? Making her pay off the money. That should teach her. You’ll get to spend time with her, and you can introduce her to people as your daughter on your terms. Or turf, however, you want to see it.”

“Yeah, okay. This is good, this might…” I glare at Clyde. “Wait a minute. You mean announce to everyone she’s my kid.” Whoa, whoa, whoa. I already blurted it to June Barne and Butch Marshall, and I’m waiting for them to blast it to the community, although there should be some confidentiality law in question there, right? I need to tell my parents before I tell the town, and then I remember I’m having dinner tomorrow night with my folks, even if my mother doesn’t know it yet.

“Okay, this could still work,” I tell Clyde who slowly smiles with pride at his suggestion, and I’m still wondering how he got to be so good at dad advice when he doesn’t have children.

+ + +

When I arrive at Elaina and George Harrington’s home, aka my parents, with two women in tow, my mother is the first to comment while my dad just lifts a questioning brow. Roxanne remained quiet and distant in the truck while Sadie’s eyes shifted back and forth between the two of us. She’s worn extra black tonight, reminding me of the girl in Beetlejuice. Black lace dress. Black hair, lips, nails.

“When William told me he was bringing two ladies to dinner, I had no idea you’d both be so beautiful,” my mother gushes, not even flinching at the darkness of Sadie’s appearance. Roxanne, on the hand, looks her typical naturalist self with a long, flowing skirt and a T-shirt with some kind of denim blazer over it. The three of us appear as mismatched as they come as I wear a dress shirt with dark pants.

For years after Giant’s wife died, my mother tried to set him up with every available woman within a fifty-mile radius. She never attempted setups with me, thinking I made my own bed to lose Rachel.

“Or so young,” my father states, stepping out of his stupor and leaning in to give Roxie a cheek kiss. “Roxanne, lovely to see you.” As the largest industry in the area—Giant Brewing Company—my father makes it a point to know all the other business owners within the community. When my brother became mayor, my father was on board with his ideas to bring tourism to our town to improve the economy. My father saw tourism as an indirect boost for the brewery. However, he’s never recognized my contribution to the brewery through serving and promoting the family beer for over fifteen years in my pub. He also doesn’t know how I assist Giant on the sly with brew craft.

“And this must be your little sister,” George Jr. flirts as he cups Sadie’s shoulders. She looks at me, but Roxanne quickly saves us all by saying, “This is Sadie. She’s my niece.”

“I heard about your sister,” my mother addresses Roxanne and then gazes at Sadie. “I’m so very sorry.” I don’t know how my mother knows these details other than her busybody nature.

“Well, let’s not stand here. Come in, come in. Dinner is almost ready.” My mother leads the ladies, as she referred to them, toward the living room while my father hangs back and walks with me.

“William, what are you up to?” he mutters because it always has to be something with me. He has no idea of the truth in his concern. As I cross into the more formal room which holds our large family better than other spaces in my childhood home, I see my brother Charlie and his daughter, Lucy, are present.

“Uncle Billy,” Lucy yells, running for me like she’s still five instead of ten and getting bigger every day.

“How’s my girl?” I tease, catching her under her arms and then pretending it’s a struggle to lift her because she’s grown so big. My eyes glance up to find Sadie watching me with my niece, and I realize I’ve said something wrong. Lucy isn’t my girl. Sadie is…or she should be. And at this moment, I realize again how I’ve missed out on a time in Sadie’s life when she was young and innocent like a nine-year-old can be.

Further greetings occur as Charlie recognizes Roxanne, and she introduces Sadie again as her niece.

My daughter, whispers through my head, and I swallow as I realize I don’t know how I will tell my family. I only planned to get Roxie and Sadie to the house. From there, I didn’t know how to break the news.