Page 53 of Speak from the Heart

My brows crease, and suddenly, Jess is at my side. “What’s wrong?”

I shake my head, but the desire to go home is strong. I’m hit by a tidal wave of emotions slamming into me over Nana and her house. How could I forget something so innocent as fireworks?

“Katie bug,” I address her. “How about if I walk you home? Then this old gal is going to bed.” I gaze down at her sweet face all covered in pink, yellow, and blue and then take the napkin from her fingers and help her wipe her face.

“You’re so good with her,” Tricia comments. “Isn’t she good to her, Jess?”

Jess grumbles something, but I don’t hear him. I focus on Katie, who offers me her dripping ice cream cone.

“Are you offering me a lick?” I ask, taking the sugary confection from her. “All finished?”

Katie nods, and I take the treat, swirl my tongue around the edges once, and then open my mouth to suck from the top. Jess groans nearby, and I’m reminded of what I did to him. I hope he’s thinking of it as well. When I glance up, I find Sami lingering as if waiting on Jess, and think, Never gonna have that again, pal.

If he never gets it again, neither do you, girl, my inner libido weeps.

On that note . . .

“Time to go, Katie bug. This fairy needs sleep.” I point at myself, and Katie’s eyes light up. I toss her cone in the nearby trash bin and reach for her hand, but she lifts her arms. She’s too big for me to carry for too long, but I don’t want to deny her.

“I’ll take her,” Jess offers. He reaches out for her, but Katie shifts away from him, stepping toward me, so I scoop her up. I don’t meet his eyes because I imagine her rebuff hurt his feelings.

“Where are you going?” Gabe calls after me as I step in the opposite direction of Nana’s. “I wanted to walk you home.”

“I have her,” Jess calls out, answering for me. In fact, he turns to face Gabe for a second. I don’t twist to see what transpires but instead continue in the direction of Jess’s house.

“Oh, the pissing match with the A.G. continues,” Tricia teases as she walks next to me.

“A.G.? Don’t you mean O.G.? Original Gangster,” I correct.

“Nope, we call him A.G. for Asshole Gabester.” She giggles, and I can’t help but laugh along with her. My thought is poor Gabe, only I don’t feel too sorry for him if he helped Jess’s wife leave him. There must be even more to that story, but I’m not privy to the details. More secrets.

When we arrive at the Carter family home, all the lights are on. Jess caught up to us, but I follow Tricia’s lead into the house and carry a very sleepy Katie up the stairs despite her weight. Jess steadies me with a hand at my back. When we get to the second floor, he steers me to a room at the end of the hall. He reaches around me to open the door to a bedroom and then guides me to another door within the room.

The second door opens into a tandem room, which is overwhelmingly pink. Katie’s space has a twin-size bed covered in a pink patchwork quilt, a small nightstand, and a princess lamp that gives off a soft glow. Jess pulls the covers back before maneuvering out of the way, and I lay Katie down on the bed. She rolls toward the wall, and I reach down to remove her tennis shoes. I turn to Jess and mouth pajamas, but he shakes his head. He covers Katie with the patchwork quilt and kisses her sticky cheek. It’s sweet and intimate, and I feel like I’m intruding when he says, “I love you.” I step back, preparing to exit the room and give them a moment, but Katie shifts in the bed.

Her eyes meet mine. Her little thumb points to her sternum. Then she crosses her arms over her chest like a giant X before pointing her index finger at me.

I love you, the gesture signs. I love you, she said.

To me.

My heart patters and pings around in my chest like a loose pinball. My fingers shake as I raise my arms and sign back as I speak. “I love you, too.”

My eyes meet Jess’s, and the normal denim blue color has turned to deadly midnight. He turns back to his child and reaches for her head to brush back her hair and kiss her one more time.

The image before me is too much. I want that.

Her silent words were too much. I want that, too.

Emotion slams into me once again.

I turn and head for the outer room. I make it inside and almost out to the hallway when a hand covers my upper arm.

“Don’t,” he commands, and I spin to face him.

“Don’t what?” I hiss, keeping my voice low.

“Don’t love her.”