Page 16 of Fight from the Heart

Sunshine and Rain

[Pam]

“Spill,” Mae says to me the second Sandy takes our drink order and leaves the booth. I don’t typically hang out at Town Tavern other than on Thursdays with my siblings, but Mae wanted all the details of my days with Jacob, and we didn’t get a chance to speak at work.

Mae and her husband, Adam, own a series of businesses. First is Eden Landscaping, inherited by Adam years back. When Mae and Adam met in college, Mae followed Adam here, and he eventually opened the retail garden center called Mae’s Flowers for her. Her business has grown over time to include a year-round facility selling everything from tulips to Christmas trees as well as a thriving gift shop with gardening products and books, and garden-related novelties and decorations. That’s where I came into the picture. Mae needed help running it all, and I began working part-time while still an EMT. When everything fell apart for me a while ago, I started working full-time for her. Even before all that, Mae and I clicked, and we’ve become good friends.

“It’s all embarrassing to admit because I was so sick,” I tell her, which she already knows because Jacob called her to say I’d be missing a few days of work.

“He sounded rugged and rough, as if his voice alone could strip you of your panties.”

She isn’t exactly wrong, and when my face heats, she narrows her eyes at me. “Busted,” she teases as our drinks arrive. Mae stares at me, waiting for the details while I grapple with how much I want to share.

“Nothing happened,” I lie. How do you tell your best friend the man of your dreams did something to you that you can’t forget but should have never let happen? “He might have come on to me, but he didn’t mean it.”

“No man accidentally comes on to a woman. Either he did it on purpose or he didn’t do it at all.”

“We were sleeping together and—”

“You what?!” Her screech turns a couple of heads in our direction, and I’m rethinking our being at the Town Tavern. While the country music plays, it might not be loud enough to drown out our conversation, and I don’t need some nosy Nellie overhearing us. It’s bad enough people look at me and wonder why I’m alone after all these years. Those who know the truth still look at me with sympathy. I’m damned if I do and damned if I don’t, and I refuse to think of Brendan tonight.

“Not sleeping-sleeping, just literally sleeping in the same bed together.”

“You were in his bed?” she shrieks again with a grin that shows teeth. Mae’s expression and good humor are contagious on a good day, but I don’t need her enthusiasm blasting my business to the entire bar.

“Mae, keep your voice down,” I state, scanning the place and then landing on the devil himself.

Jacob.

Mae looks over her shoulder in the direction of my frozen gaze and then back at me. “Where?” she questions, and I realize I’ve said his name aloud. I’ve never seen him in town. In the two and a half years I’ve known him, he hardly comes to Main Street.

I turn back to Mae uncertain how to respond. Jacob told me he was surprised I’d never told my mother who he was nor have I told my best friend. I thought women did that shit. Maybe they do, but I hadn’t because of the NDA. I took his privacy seriously. Glancing back at him, I see a woman saddled up next to him, and they look cozy.

Assuming I have his newfound permission to tell my best friend about him, I tip my head in his direction. “That’s him. By the bar.”

“Holy shit, Pam. He’s hot. You need to lick that, or I will.” This is Mae’s reference to marking someone you like. She would never cheat on Adam. He’s actually cheating on her, or so she suspects, but she hasn’t been able to prove his affair. I think she’s crazy because Mae is great. So why would her husband cheat on her? Then again, what do I know about investigating adultery? It was happening under my nose once, and I never sniffed it out. At work, Adam dotes on his wife with sweet cheek kisses and an arm around her shoulder. I don’t want to surmise those tender touches disguise bigger issues, but I hadn’t seen it in my own past relationship. I missed the signs because of tender touches such as those.

“Now, I need to know everything,” Mae prompts.

“I was in his bed.” I pause, waiting for hysteria to hit her again, and when it doesn’t, I continue. “And he’d been dreaming. I woke him up, and he…” Pinned me to the bed, spread my thighs, and went down on me. I can’t tell her this. I don’t want to share the details for two reasons. Besides being embarrassed to share them, I want to keep them all for me. “He misunderstood who I was. He has a girlfriend.”

Only he told me Mandi and he were no more. I’d heard that before, though, so I don’t have much faith that they are really over. They are constantly hot and cold for one another.

Mae watches me after I mention the girlfriend. “How can he misunderstand who you are? Maybe you need to back up and start at the beginning of this . . . working relationship.” Being as I’ve never told anyone about Jacob, it’s hard to know where to start. The accident. The accusations. His calling me angel. He is a famous author and I’m a blogger who wrote him a not-so-favorable review. That was another part to our strange circumstances, but even that I’m not certain I can mention.

“Mae, I signed an NDA to work with him, so I can’t tell you more than I work for him. But it’s never interfered with the garden center.” I don’t want her thinking I’ve used my time at her shop doing blog stuff.

“His voice could melt panties, and looking at him, he could break hearts,” she teases. “Does this have the potential for friends with benefits or full-on heartbreak?”

Glancing back at Jacob sitting next to that woman, I find his eyes are aimed at me. My fingers twitch to wave, but I don’t know if I’m allowed to acknowledge him in public. Wrapping my hands around my margarita glass, I look back at Mae.

“Heartbreak.” I sigh. Being in love with my boss has no other option, and after what he did to me, I don’t know if I should keep working with him.

“We don’t need another Brendan,” Mae states softly, and my eyes hold hers.

“No, we don’t,” I whisper, and thankfully, the subject is dropped.

Forty minutes and two margaritas later, Mae and I have moved onto her concerns about Adam and the possibility of his affair. We’re laughing while it isn’t funny when Sandy brings us another round.