Page 44 of View With Your Heart

“What are you doing here?” she questions, as she does each time I’m suddenly in a place she doesn’t expect me to be. Quickly, I explain my sister’s invitation.

“Why hasn’t anyone told me Gee and Holden play on the same team?”

“Probably the same reason no one told you Britton owned the tea shop,” Ethan interjects, still standing on the other side of me. I didn’t consider I’d need to bring a chair.

“What reason is that?” Britton asks, curious at my brother’s comment.

“No one thought to tell him because he never listens to local news anyway,” Ethan states.

“As if you did when you didn’t live here,” I tease of him.

“True.” Ethan laughs. Then he claps his hands and cheers on Holden, who is up to bat.

“I’d be surprised that you’d have remembered me anyway,” Britton mutters next to me, and I turn on her.

“I never forgot you, Candy. Never.” I’m frustrated with everything today, and I swipe a hand through my hair. Gee and Britton are so immersed in the life I left behind, living here and loving it, and it conflicts with my thoughts of my hometown. Then there’s Brit’s walls and the question on my mind about that tax bill.

Lakefront property can have steep taxes, and I’m still concerned for her. I know the property is special to her and keep wondering how much of a risky position she’s in. When I consider the summer I spent so much time at Leo’s, the place is special to me as well. Leo and Gertie were pretty liberal about Brit and me spending time in her room or just hanging out at the house. As long as Britton was safe and they trusted me, they didn’t worry about what we were doing.

“I wanted to thank you for batting practice with Gee yesterday. He really had a good time,” Britton says, interrupting my thoughts.

“Yeah? Me too. He’s a great kid.” I smile over at him, waiting his turn on the bench to bat.

“Theo also mentioned something.”

My attention swings back to Brit. “What’d he say?”

“He told me he might have threatened you a bit, and he apologized to me in case you walked away without a word.” Theo’s honesty hangs in the air between us. “I thought since I didn’t hear from you yesterday, you decided to honor his warning.”

She scoops hair over her ear and holds her hand on her neck like she does. She doesn’t look at me but stares off at the ballfield. Not wanting my brother to overhear us, I press at Britton to move down the fence a bit. She’s still in sight of Gee and the game, but we’re out of earshot of listeners.

“Brit, I’ve got to admit, I can’t keep up. I want to see you. I want to get to know you, who you are now, but you keep shutting me down, and after Theo’s words, I didn’t know what direction to take. I get it I’m only here for another week, but I don’t see why that needs to hold us back from hanging out.”

She looks up at me, eyes softening a bit. “Because I don’t want to risk Gee getting attached to you. I don’t want him getting his heart set on something that won’t happen, and I won’t apologize for being overprotective. He’s already lost too much.”

“What won’t happen? What am I missing here?” I just don’t understand.

“I just need to think of Gee,” she mutters.

“And what about you? What do you want? What do you need? I get it that you’re a mom, but you deserve something for yourself.” What else is she protecting? Her body? Her heart? She already has mine, and I’d willingly give her more. I just want her to tell me things, talk to me.

She looks away from me, shoulders stiffening. “That’s where the tea shop came in.”

The comment knocks the wind out of my sail a bit.

“A tea shop can’t be the only thing in your life.” I sigh, and she turns on me.

“When I gave up dancing for Gee, I did it gladly. It was what I wanted. When Patrick knew he was going to die, he wanted to know what else I wanted to do with my life. I hadn’t worked, and he knew I’d need more than being Gee’s mother, especially as he grew older. What was my secondary dream? TeasMe! is it. It is for me,” she defends, growing agitated with her speech. “You can understand that, can’t you?”

“Of course,” I say, swiping at my hair, agitated myself. “Filmmaking has become my secondary dream, and I want to have lots of them in my life, but I’m talking about you.” I look over my shoulder, checking that no one is too close to hear the direction of this conversation.

“What do you personally want?” Our eyes connect, but too quickly, she looks away. I reach out and cup her chin. “Talk to me, please.”

“Gavin, what I want is immaterial to everything else.”

“Don’t say that. You might be a mother and a business owner, but surely, there’s more.”

Tell me you want me. Tell me you’ll let me do things for you. Tell me you’ll let me take care of you.