Page 57 of View With Your Heart

Gavin slowly slips lower under the sheets, and I lay my head on my pillow as we talk about more generic things.

“Speaking of fishing, that metal boat you have doesn’t seem any sturdier than Leo’s old thing.”

I chuckle. “We hardly use it, but Theo said the same thing. He’s taken Gee out a few times in it, but they never go far. Gee isn’t allowed to take it alone. Ever.”

“I’d like to buy him a new one,” Gavin admits, and I gasp.

“No, Gavin. That’s way too generous. We don’t need it. It’s already August. Soon enough, summer will turn to fall. Maybe next year, I can afford it.”

Gavin nods. “I’d like him to have it anyway. Maybe he’ll remember fishing with me.” My chest tightens with the thought. Why would Gavin even want Gee to remember him? “He’s such a great kid.” Gavin’s voice holds a smile as he speaks about my son. “You’ve done such a great job as his mother, Brit.”

Tears threaten to break as the sentiment is genuine and sweet, especially from him. I swallow around a lump in my throat. My mouth suddenly dry.

“Hey, how are things on the taxes front?”

“Ugh.” I fall to my back again, blinking up at the ceiling.

“Tell me.” He perches on his elbow, looking down at me.

“It’s nothing I can’t handle.”

“Dammit, Britton,” he says softly. “Let me in.”

“Fine. Her name is Rebecca Sterling, and she came to see me earlier today. She’s been relentless this summer. She’s always telling me the property is worth millions, especially because of how it’s situated, and she knows about the back taxes. It’s a lot of money. Some days, I try to tell myself it’s only a house, but still . . .”

“Don’t ever sell, Brit. This place is too important. I’ve already told you I can help you if you need help.”

I shake my head, not wanting to have this discussion. I can’t think about losing this house. It’s all I have left of Leo and Gertie. It’s all I have left of good memories.

“Tell this woman to fuck off.”

“I do. Well, not so colorful, but every time she approaches me, I tell her it’s not for sale.”

“What do you need to get her off your back? An attorney? An accountant? I’ll hook you up with the best.”

I chuckle bitterly. “You’re sweet, but no, thank you.”

“Have you ever considered adding to this place? Making it bigger?” I roll to look at him. I have considered a larger home on this land, a little more space for Gee and me.

“I can’t afford it,” I say sheepishly. I’m not embarrassed by my means. It’s just the truth.

“Say you could afford it,” Gavin speaks as if reading my mind. “Just for fun, what would you do? How would you lay it out?”

For the next half hour, I tell him about my dream house—the layout of the rooms, the open concept with lots of windows, two stories with more bedrooms even though I don’t have more children.

“Why don’t you have more kids, Candy?”

“Patrick was . . .” I almost say the truth, which would give away everything. The words were on the tip of my tongue. “It just didn’t happen for us.”

Gavin nods. “That’s too bad.” He folds to his back, glancing up at the ceiling, and then looks back at me. “I would have loved to give you that house and fill all those rooms with babies.”

My eyes fill with tears, and again, I say to him, “You’re sweet.”

“You’re sweet, Candy Girl.” He rolls to face me. “And you deserved so much more.”

Weakly smiling at him, I say, “Don’t pity me, Gavin. I had a lot.” I did. I had Patrick when I didn’t deserve him. I had Leo and Gertie, who loved me unconditionally, and I have Gee. “I have more than most, even if it’s unconventional.”

Gavin nods before leaning forward and brushing his lips over mine.