Page 76 of View With Your Heart

“I know. I’m sorry,” she stammers as I surge into her over and over again.

“But I can’t stop thinking about you. I can’t stop thinking about us.” I mutter, biting her earlobe. “I can’t get enough of you.”

“Gavin,” she hisses, holding onto me as though she’s afraid to let go as I piston into her. The door at her back jiggles in its frame as she bounces over me. My hand comes between us, finding the spot she needs to help her get off. I need to feel her around me. I need her to feel out of control like I feel lately.

“Get there, baby,” I whisper to her, and she opens her mouth but nips my shoulder as she breaks apart. Another thrust and I’m done. I spill into her, filling her with everything I have.

Immediately, I lean back while still attached to her. “Shit. I didn’t use a condom.”

She stares at me. Quickly, I pull out of her, lower her to her feet, and step away from her. Hastily, I tuck myself back in my briefs and shorts while I watch her shakily reach for her underwear and pull them back into place.

“Why didn’t you have more babies with him?” I snarl, considering what we’d just done.

“Patrick was sterile,” she says, keeping her eyes on me, but they cloud. “We shouldn’t have done that,” she says again.

“Gone without a condom?” I snort. Even with several, I still got her pregnant, but perhaps it was that one time I went without one. I almost laugh, although I find nothing funny about our past. I’d find it hilarious if I had been included in what happened afterward.

“Any of that,” she says, pointing at my shorts.

I huff. “I can’t seem to stay away from you,” I say in frustration.

“We can’t keep coming together like this.”

“But we do because there’s something between us, always drawing us to each other.”

“It’s kept us apart for years.”

“You kept us apart,” I tell her, but it isn’t entirely true. She pushes off the door and straightens her skirt before turning for the knob. My hand reaches around her, flattening my palm on the door to hold it closed.

“Look, Brit. I’m sorry, that was out of line.”

“It’s honest, which is more than you can say about me, right?” she huffs.

“That’s not it.”

“Then what is it?” She spins to face me.

“I don’t know how to be right now, but I don’t want to be without you, without either of you.”

She doesn’t comment, and we hear feet stomping up the stairs.

“Mom.” Gee rushes to my door, and Britton steps aside so I can open it. “Look what Grandpa Jack gave me.” He seems to have modified the label for my dad, which is just fine. In his hands, he presents an old mitt of mine.

“Where did you get that?”

“Grandpa Jack had it downstairs. He said it was yours, and he thought I might like to have it.”

“Cool,” Britton says, reaching out for her son and stroking her hand lovingly around his face. Our son. I notice her hands still shaking from what we’ve just done.

“Is this your old room? What are you two doing in here?”

“Just showing your mom the old place.” Gee steps deeper into the room and looks at all my old things. The posters and awards. A few pictures and the trophies.

“Did you go to Cooperstown?” he asks.

“They didn’t have the kind of setup they have now when I was younger.” I sound like I’m ancient, but twenty-six years ago, there wasn’t the tournament program they have presently. Gee nods, taking in the stuff in my room before turning back to his mom.

“Grandpa Jack wants to know if you want ice cream.”