Page 6 of The Heart Remembers

“Hey,” I respond. The sun is setting and I’m just taking a moment to right myself. It’s roughly eight o’clock, and I took a pass on visiting the local brewery outlet with a large collection of my cousins.

“Whatcha doing out here?”

It should be obvious with the setting sun, but I have a different answer. “Just needed a little family separation.” I remember Levi is essentially an orphan with no parents and a dead brother the minute I say it.

Nodding to accept my answer, he holds out a beer for me. “Thanks.”

“Mind if I sit with you?” When I shake my head, he lowers himself to a space on the boulder beside me, and I ignore the pinch to his face as he maneuvers his leg.

“You okay?” I nod at his lower leg, being familiar with a few patients in his condition. Levi massages his upper right thigh.

“It’s fine. Just warm.” The sock liner can get sweaty and itching in the heat of this July evening. I’d suggest he just remove it, but I don’t want to offend him.

We sit in silence for a few minutes, allowing the light breeze to do the talking as it floats around us. After the Jet Skis are put away and the boats docked for the night, it’s generally quiet here.

“I hear congratulations are in order,” he finally says.

“For what?” I laugh, turning to look at him. Dark eyes meet mine.

“Heard you’re getting engaged.” A heavy pause follows the statement, and I clear my throat, glancing out at the descending sun.

“Yeah, about that . . .” I pause again, then drag blowing hairs behind my ear. “Derek gave me these for our four-year anniversary last week. Then I broke up with him.” On display for Levi are a beautiful pair of diamond earrings. I feel Levi staring at me, but I don’t gaze back at him. I shrug. “My family will be disappointed, but I don’t have the heart to tell them yet.”

“You told your dad Derek couldn’t make it.” Levi’s merely stating facts. During dinner, I did say that to my parents when they asked again why he wasn’t here. I heard Aunt Tricia saying how they all expected a proposal this week, and I had to admit I might have been expecting one as well. When it didn’t happen during our anniversary dinner, I had an epiphany.

“Did it not sound believable?” I question, and Levi bitterly chuckles.

“What do I know about relationships?”

“When you live with someone, you get comfortable, right?” I begin. “At first, it’s all exciting. You could have sex on the kitchen table if you want. Walk naked through the house. Do it on the living room floor—”

“I get the picture,” Levi cuts me off.

“Then one day, you realize you don’t think the kitchen table will support the two of you, and you never would walk naked through the house, and the living room floor is just really hard. And you see a family shopping at the grocery store, and you want that family. You want to argue over flavors of ice cream, and he doesn’t.” I pause to exhale and then clarify. “He doesn’t want the ice cream or the family, that is.”

I peer over at Levi, hoping he might understand a little bit. “I’m not ready to tell my parents. Not this week. It’s Tom’s week.”

Levi watches me a second and then looks away, staring out at the glassy calm water.

“Alicia left me when AJ was two months old. She hadn’t wanted him, but I asked her to have him, for me, for us. I asked her to marry me, and she said no. Promised I’d still take care of us even if all we did was live together, but she didn’t want that either.” His head lowers. “She found someone else.”

He lifts his beer bottle and takes a swig, and I watch his throat roll. Licking my lips, I fight the desire to kiss him there, just under the scruff. I want to comfort him. I understand.

“Does she see AJ?”

Levi shakes his head. “She left both of us.”

“People suck,” I say, not really believing that statement. I believe in love and happily ever after, just not for me, not yet.

“Yeah, but they don’t. Some other guy will come along and steal your heart because you stole his, and you’ll be a million times better off. You’ll own a kitchen table stable enough to hold you both, walk naked through your halls, and fuck on the hardwood floors because who would notice the floors if you were his wife? And you’ll have babies. Lots of babies because of the table, the hallway wall, and the floor.”

I chuckle, flushed by his response. “You’re sweet, but the hallway wall?”

“If you walked around naked, no man would let you get down that hallway before pinning you against the wall and taking you.” His eyes roam the side of my body, and more heat floods my face. Oh, my.

“That’s . . . sweet, too.” That was more than sweet.

Levi snorts and turns his attention back to the lake. Lifting his beer for his lips, he mutters before he drinks, “Yeah, sweet.” He takes another hearty pull of the beer, and I turn away from him, sipping my own summer shanty.