Page 34 of The Way Love Heals

“Oh, that’s great news, Nyle. You’ve never talked to me about a woman, so I’m intrigued. How did the two of you meet?”

I chuckled and scrubbed my hands down my face. “We had what was supposed to be a one-night stand. At least, that was her intentions. I knew when I saw her that I desired something more from her than any other woman I’d encountered. She’s beautiful, inside and out. After we had sex that night, I felt bad because I had to leave her for my first practice. Imagine my surprise when I see her there.”

“Oh, wow. Really?”

“Yes. She’s one of the players’ moms. I continued to pursue her because of what I felt in my heart. There was no doubt in my mind that she felt it too. It’s been almost three months, and we made it official last night.”

“Congratulations. From the smile on your face, it’s obvious you’re happy.” Dr. Morgan jotted a few things down on her notebook before questioning, “Tell me. Does she know about your past?”

I nodded. “She does. Crazy thing is that I told her within a week of us meeting. She realized I wasn’t comfortable with touching her without asking, and she questioned me about it. At first, I didn’t give her the full details, only a vague story. I was grateful because she didn’t push to know more. She accepted what I told her. It came up again, and I felt good telling her about it. It broke her down because she’s a mother. In the same breath, she let me know it was okay not to ask her. She’s been helping and encouraging me to heal in that way.”

Anytime I thought about it, I wanted to tear up. No one would understand what it meant to me to have Brittish accept me for who I was while encouraging me to change in a healthy way. I’d always had my family there, but it was different with her.

“That tells me she’s genuine. She cares about you, Nyle. I understand it can be hard to accept and give love after what you went through, but don’t allow it to affect what the two of you are building. You’ve grown tremendously. I’d hate to see you go backwards.”

I rubbed my hands together, and my tongue lined the inside of my jaw. “She came looking for me.”

“Who? Renee?”

“Yes.”

“And how did that make you feel?”

“Triggered, but I was able to hold it together. I’m not sure what she wanted or why she came looking for me. I’ve been praying she doesn’t come around again, but I can’t shake the nagging in my stomach that she will. I’m not sure how I’ll react if I see her again, Doctor.”

Over the years, I’d learned to push Renee to the back of my mind. When she did cross it, I felt sick to my stomach. I hadn’t talked about it with anyone, but I had been looking over my shoulder anytime I was out. Something told me she was hiding in the shadows, waiting for the right time to pop out again. I prayed it wasn’t when I was alone, because I wasn’t sure if I’d be able to control myself.

“Tell me. Do you think she’ll come looking for you again?”

“I do.”

Dr. Morgan sighed. “I feel like we’ll need to go back to two-week sessions for now, Nyle. I want to keep a close eye on you, so if you need an emergency session or simply need me in any capacity, contact me directly. You have my number. Until then, let’s talk about how we’ll navigate this.”

Dr. Morgan and I were on the call for another forty-five minutes. Anytime I talked to her, I either left feeling light or heavy. Today was an in-between day. While it felt good telling her about Brittish and our relationship, it was rough talking about Renee. My mood wasn’t completely sour, but it wasn’t all the way sweet either.

And Brittish instantly noticed.

She joined me in my office, placing herself on my lap with her arm draped around my shoulders. I rested my head against her breasts, and her hand went straight to my scalp.

“How did you sleep?” I inquired, rubbing her exposed thigh. She wore nothing but an oversized T-shirt that barely covered her thickness. She almost had me distracted, but Renee kept creeping back in, ruining the moment.

“Great, especially being beside you.” She kissed the top of my head. “What’s on your mind, Nyle? I can feel something is bothering you.”

“I just had a call with my therapist, and we talked about Renee.”

“Did it trigger you?”

“Not necessarily, but it does have me in somewhat of a mood.” I glanced up at her, and she peered down at me with concern dancing in her eyes. She was so damn pretty without makeup. Her skin was flawless. “But you being here, in my arms, is making me feel better.”

“Are you sure? Is there anything I can do to help you?”

“You simply being here helps me.”

Before she could respond, her phone vibrated against my desk. She leaned over and picked up. A slight frown etched her face as she answered. Not wanting to be in her business, I tapped her thigh to get up, and I went to the kitchen to see what I had to make us some breakfast. Brittish came in about ten minutes later, fully dressed with her purse in hand.

“I’m sorry, but I need to go get AJ.”

“Is everything okay?”