Page 53 of The Way Love Heals

“Good morning, Nyle.” Dr. Morgan’s gaze slowly traveled over me, and her brows furrowed. “This may sound unprofessional, but you’ve been my client long enough for me to tell you that you look like shit. What happened?”

For the first time in days, my lips curved upward. I ran my hands through my unkempt hair and agreed. “I do, but I have my reasons.”

“Well, I’m listening.”

I ran down everything to Dr. Morgan. Not one detail or emotion was left out. Putting it all on the table was exactly what I needed. With each confession, I felt better. My emotions slowly felt as if they were stabilizing. By the time I was done, Dr. Morgan had taken her glasses off and was shaking her head.

“Nyle, that is terrible. You shutting off makes sense. Your mother set you back, but tell me something.”

“Yes?”

“Why was your first instinct to isolate yourself?”

“Because I didn’t want to take anyone I loved on the emotional roller coaster waiting to take me on a ride. I needed to deal with everything on my own first.”

“Why take on something so detrimental like that alone when you have people around you who love you? I understand wanting to process emotions, but we’ve talked about how that’s not a healthy choice for you. When you isolate yourself, you don’t know how to return to normal. It takes you months, remember?” Dr. Morgan reminded me, and I expelled a sigh.

“You’re right, but that’s not the case this time.”

“So, why aren’t you around your loved ones?”

“I needed time.”

“You’ve had enough time, Nyle. You said your family was there when it happened, correct?”

“Yes.”

“How did they react when you left alone?”

I massaged my dry beard. “They begged me not to go, letting me know they’d help me through it.”

“Did you believe them?”

“I did.”

“And how did that make you feel?”

Ah. There it was. Dr. Morgan always got me before I could process what she was doing.

With a light chuckle, I said, “You got me.”

“Oh, no. I need to hear you say it, Nyle. How did it make you feel?”

“It made me feel like I was loved and wasn’t alone. Like I could give them some of the weight when it got too heavy.”

“And instead, you wanted to be stubborn and carry it by yourself.”

“But you get why, right?”

Dr. Morgan put her glasses back on and jotted a few things down before replying, “I do, but you need to go be with them, Nyle. Give yourself grace. Give yourself peace. Give yourself love. You told me that was everything Brittish gave you, so why not surrounded yourself with it?”

Brittish.

I missed the hell out of her.

“I’m worried I failed her, Dr. Morgan. I’ve failed to do some of the things she’s asked me to do. What if it’s too much for her? What if she won’t forgive me?”

“If she truly loves you, she will. You won’t know unless you get up and go see. I’m proud of you for reaching out to me. That tells me you’re ready to free yourself from isolation. I don’t need you to sit in that bed a second longer, Nyle.”