Page 216 of Show Me

His expression changes. “I didn’t know that.”

“Nobody did. She said I wasn’t fun anymore. That I was too depressed and wasn't paying enough attention to her.” Saying it out loud after all these years feels strange. “So I stopped giving people enough to hurt me.”

Jake studies me. “Until Ruby.”

Yeah. Until Ruby.

“I stayed away from her because I knew she’d be different.” I stare across the street. “If I let myself have her, I’d have something worth losing.”

“And now?”

I laugh without humor. “Now I lost her anyway.”

“That wasn’t the question.”

I finally look at him. There’s no point hiding from it anymore. “I love her.” The words scare the hell out of me. But they’re true. “I think I always have.”

Jake nods like this is the least surprising thing I’ve ever told him. “Then maybe quit deciding for Ruby what kind of man she deserves.”

That shuts me up. Because loving her isn’t the question anymore. It’s whether she’ll give me a second chance to show her.

Chapter One Hundred Fourteen

Ruby

The exam room is cooler than it needs to be, especially since I’m naked but my socks while wearing one of those cloth smocks with blue and pink swirls on it. Not that the doctor’s office in Brookhaven would’ve been any warmer.

Rather than dealing with the drama of home, I had Dad take me to a clinic in the city. Where no one knows me. Xavier. Or anything that’s been going on the last couple of months.

I sit on the edge of the table, staring at a faded diagram of the female reproductive system while I wait for someone to confirm what three pregnancy tests have already told me.

I’m passed the point of hoping that they’re wrong, and now, I’m monitoring every twinge with utter panic that something could go wrong.

The door opens, and the doctor steps inside with a tablet in her hand. “Sorry to keep you waiting.”

“That’s okay.”

Dr. Taylor settles onto the stool. “We got your blood work back.”

My hands tighten together in my lap. “And?”

“You’re pregnant.”

Just like that. Two words. My breath catches anyway. “Definitely?”

Her smile softens. “Definitely.”

Something warm moves through my chest. I’m having a baby. Xavier’s baby.

“How far along?”

“Based on the dates you gave us, approximately nine weeks. We’ll get a more precise date when you have your ultrasound.”

Nine weeks.

My mind immediately does the math even though I already know.

That first night.